About Me

Name: The Crawfish
Biography
Loading...

Create Your Own Blog Find Other Townhall Blogs

Comments

Blog Roll

 
Blogging Friends of The Swamp

Coronation Day Edition, The Weekly Claw

Today’s edition is a special one that must be printed, framed, and hung on the wall with all of the rest of the Obamania schlock you’ve seen in the supermarket checkout lines and advertised on TV.  Coronation Day is finally here! Let the media, the heterophobes, the Jihadists, and the leeches upon society rejoice!

Everyone’s favorite Congressional cartoon character, Nostrildamis, picks one of the coldest days in years to promise fast action on legislation regarding “climate change” and energy independence. How are we going to achieve energy independence if the Democrats oppose oil production in the US and offshore? Until we have a viable alternate energy source for cars, trucks, heavy equipment, aircraft, and ships, and those machines are fully converted, we will need oil-based fuels, but the Democrats want to keep us reliant upon their arab masters.

The walking, talking ego that is The Chosen One is now suggesting that a woman at the Washington Post should name her child after him. Sheesh. After the visit, someone at the Post said ”there goes our journalistic objectivity” as if they had shown any in the past year.

Iran’s Mah(p-tooey)mood Iminajihad is demanding that the Obama Administration must change the scope of America’s involvement to within our own borders while saying that Israel’s continued existence is “not feasible”. This is the guy that Obama wants to have tea and crumpets with, and no preconditions?

The muslims are now saying that Israel needs to be booted from the UN probably so that they can increase the pro-muslim power bloc there.

For the past few years, the Democrats have been blasting the President for his “warrantless wiretaps” that were sooooo highly unconstitutional (because they were GOOD for national security). They said that the FISA courts had to issue warrants to make the international communications intelligence gathering (which is a standard intel tool for all nations) legal, but the FISA courts have now ruled in favor of Bush and the powers of the President in regards to national security.

Speaking of opposition to national security, Charlie Rangel (D-NY) is going to reintroduce legislation to bring back the draft so more whites will be forced to go into the military. As a professional military man myself, I only want to see people who WANT to be in the military join up. I want people who are going to be SERIOUS about this profession.

This year’s coronation ceremonies will cost over $150 MILLION, and the media and the liberals (but I repeat myself) have absolutely no problems with the cost. It is The Messiah that is getting feted, so spare no expense! Should we contrast this attitude with what liberals were saying about the 2005 inauguration that cost less than 1/3 of this one? Anything Obama: wonderful. Anything Bush: extreme, terrible, racist, hateful, etc.

Poor widdle babies. Four Mexican teenagers were spray painted by police after they got caught performing graffiti vandalism. They should have been kneecapped, too.

Blogger arik sent me this story of a man who ran from justice but has returned to face the music. Pay attention to the paragraph below the video box for the reason he came back to stand trial. The Messiah will set the guilty FREE!

Now tell me y’all didn’t see this one coming. A movie gets made that glorifies a gangsta-rapper, and four people get stabbed at the premiere party. This is one place where Barack Obama might be able to make a positive lasting impression on America. If he can provide a positive role model for the black youth….well, being a politician in the corrupt Chicago system isn’t exactly POSITIVE, but it is better than the rap/hip-hop/gang/drug/welfare culture, isn’t it?

Red Nanny is on such a power kick that she is now looking to prosecute W for crimes such as leading us to war in Iraq. Here’s a hint, Queen Nanny: read the ceasefire agreement from 1991 that the Senate ratified. It not only makes the 2003 Iraq invasion okay, it REQUIRES IT!

The article says that Italian designers have gone from riches to rags in their new styles, but it looks to The Crawfish like they are embracing Islam-chic.  Just another part of the surrender of Europe.

Proving what many of us have been saying about him for years, Juan McAmnesty….er, John McCain came out and said that many of The Chosen One’s appointments are ones that he himself would have made. Yes, McCain is STILL a liberal Democrat.

And here is more proof that our nation is filled with IDIOTS!

Please tell me that I’m not the only one who saw this coming as of November 5th. Democrats are now starting the process to overturn the 22nd Amendment so that this year’s American Idol winner can serve more than two terms as President.

Even on his way out of the door, W still doesn’t get it. Blogger Darvin Dowdy found a story that shows W to STILL believe that the GOP must embrace amnesty or be seen as anti-immigrant. Wrong answer! We must embrace LEGAL immigration and uphold our LAWS! Conservatives, and most of America, are not anti-immigrant. We just want to control immigration and only let in people who have been checked out, and who have obeyed our laws to get here.

PARTIAL VICTORY! W has commuted the sentences of Ramos and Compean, but refused to pardon them, saying their trials were fair. The only crime that they were guilty of was poor marksmanship when they shot Davila. He should have assumed room temperature at that time. Once again, W surrenders to the open borders crowd and his real allies in the Mexican government.

If you want proof that Obama’s supporters are trashy, we’ve got it for ya!

Now high schools are censoring students who are critical of The Messiah, but the same schools probably celebrate any anti-Bush statements.

Even Canada is more anti-terrorist than Obama seems to be. Now THAT is funny!

Speaking of Obama and his people being soft on terrorism, His people requested that the IDF get out of Gaza before the inauguration, according to a top defense official. We must be nice and sing Kumbaya with the muslims, so they will willfully ignore the commandments of Islam (the ones that say to enslave or kill all Infidels).

Playing nice-nice with our enemies is now officially the policy of The Chosen One’s administration, as outlined by the written statements of Her Thighness to the Senate.

Israel has foolishly accepted a ceasefire with Hamas, but Hamas vows to continue smuggling in weapons to continue the fight, in spite of the terms of the ceasefire. The Crawfish could have told you THAT was gonna happen. I also could have told you that Hamas would declare a full-fledged VICTORY since the IDF didn’t finish the job. Nothing short of the complete and total destruction of Hamas and the expulsion of all so-called “palestinians” from Gaza would have been seen as anything but an Israeli defeat.

King Barack I seems to be looking to many sources for advise, including one very prominent liberal Democrat who wants to still be seen as a “Republican.”

Too bad that Monday’s weather where The Crawfish resides ain’t happening down in DC. As of 5PM, our subdivision has about 6 inches of Glo-Bull Warming on the ground and the snow is continuing. That would have been perfect for the coronation celebration!

A federal judge appointed by Bill Clinton has blocked oil and gas exploration near some parks because air quality impact studies haven’t been performed. Just another way liberals want us to remain dependent upon their friends, the muslims, for our energy, else we give up our energy use all together.

Actor Ben Affleck is being invited to testify before Congress concerning The Congo. First, unless there is some strategic national interest in The Congo, why are we having hearings on that dump? Second, who cares what another overpaid Hollyweird line-reader has to say about some foreign nation?

Now this one is really rich. Last week, His Highness stated that only government could solve all of our problems, but now he states, ”Government can only do so much” which begs the question…WHICH IS IT?????

If you believe, like The Crawfish does, that The Prophet Algoracle and his Gorons are complete frauds, and that Glo-Bull Warming is a hoax, you are encouraged to contact him with this link and let him know. Hat tip to blogger Jesse “The Mind” Norman and his comments at The Weekly Claw, Townhall edition.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (40) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

1-17-09 The Saturday Claw

The material just keeps pouring in. Here I am posting Saturday’s column at noon on Thursday. If this keeps up, Josh and the rest of the staff at AllMilitary.com are gonna have to schedule me THREE times per week. Well, either that or I’m gonna have to take a vacation without internet access.
 
By now, you are all aware of the miracle of US Air Flight 1549 and their crash landing in the Hudson River.  Everything that could go right in that mishap did, from the sturdiness of the aircraft, the excellence of the piloting, the lack of panic among the passengers, the good job by the cabin crew in evacuating the plane, and the people of Noo Yawk who helped rescue everyone.  The passengers and crew would have not had their luggage and belongings ruined and their travel plans wrecked, and US Air would not have lost a multi-million dollar aircraft if some other people had done the right thing in the first place.  If more people had cooked goose for Christmas this year…..

One of the few areas that I do not begrudge the government taking control over our lives is public safety. That being stated, I do NOT agree with the National Safety Council’s recommendation that all cell phone usage when driving be outlawed. As long as it is legal to eat, play with the radio, have a conversation with others in the car, apply makeup, shave, read a newspaper, and pick your nose while driving, talking on the phone should be allowed.

The socialists in Europe have now outlawed the 100w incandescent light bulb, a la Californication, and are now looking at banning plasma TVs because they use more electricity than LCD models. I guess letting the PEOPLE decide what they want is a bad thing. Freedom is verboten!

Lately, I’ve been uttering the phrase “we’ve read this book before” quite a bit in regards to the economic plans emanating from DC. Massive federal spending and public works projects was the attempted solution that FDR and his people used in the 1930s, and they worked so well that the Depression was drawn out for years longer than it should have lasted, only to be ended by WW2. PEBO and the rest of the leftists want to try it again. It will not stop there, and we really have read this book before as the Wall Street Journal points out.

Note to all radio personalities: Whatever you do, make sure that you do NOT defend Christianity on the air or you just might get fired. Islam wins again in Scotland.

Real scientists, you know…the kind that have proven time and again that global warming and cooling is associated with solar activity instead of human activity, have some more potential bad news for us in regards to the sun. That big, bright, hot thing might cause us more problems soon, and they’re not talkin’ about temperature changes.

Does anybody really doubt what the muslims plan for the world? Here, in their own words, is what they want to impose.

The Chosen One has decided that it is a good time to rub the wounds of the Episcopal Church raw and to throw salt in them. To placate the heterophobes of America, he has invited “bishop” Eugene Robinson to deliver an invocation at the Lincoln Memorial during Coronation Week. It really is fitting. The incoming leader of the nation opposes the very foundation of the nation, The Constitution, and one of his advisors is a leader of a church, but he opposes the very foundation of it, the Holy Bible. I keep telling y’all that liberals hate all rules that have any restrictions on behavior.

Now a Democrat (imagine that) is reintroducing legislation that would make OPEC and the arab states subject to US anti-trust laws, so the US government could charge them with collusion when they limit supplies or fix prices. If that were to pass, the arabs would laugh at us while they immediately cut our supplies and quadruple our prices. Does that Dim-bulb Senator expect the FBI to go over there and arrest them?

I’m not saying that there was any pay-for-play politics EVER associated with $lick and Chillary but…okay, maybe I HAVE been saying that for 16 years. Anyways, The Chosen One and The Frozen One have an “agreement” regarding her husband’s foreign fundraising. Basically, he can keep it up as long as he wants, and it will not reflect negatively on her as SecState, even if she is dealing with the same leaders that he is money-grubbing from. In response to this, the Republicans in the Senate are refusing to make an issue of it in her confirmation hearings. WHY NOT?

Blogger Edna Eagle asked The Crawfish and some others about the nominee for Attorney General, Eric Holder. She comes to question him regarding his stance on the 2nd Amendment and his support of the gun ban in DC that the SCOTUS case of Heller v. DC threw out last year. Holder’s history in the Justice Department and a deputy to Mr. Janet Reno included breaking department rules to get Puerto Rican TERRORISTS pardoned (to get the Rican vote in NY for Chillary’s Senate campaign) as reported on Tuesday. He also supported terrorist organizations when he represented Chiquita Brands International. They made payments to terrorist groups in Columbia, and he defended them, even stating that “there is no definition of terrorism.” Will THIS get proper opposition from the GOP Senators? I doubt it.  They don’t have the intestinal fortitude to challenge a black man who is being protected by the media.

Bill Richardson was at least smart enough to drop his Commerce nomination when his legal problems surfaced. Timothy Geithner, the nominee for Treasury, isn’t so smart. Treasury runs the IRS, and Geithner (until a few days ago) owed the IRS $34,000 because he DIDN’T PAY TAXES on income a few years ago. He also has nanny pay & immigration status problems. Instead of getting any opposition, these problems have been swept under the rug because he is sooooo “qualified.”

The nominee for Energy Czar, as reported in the last column, has been a member of many socialist groups, who are now scrambling to remove her name from their websites. Carol Browner also has ethics problems from her years as head of the EPA including destruction of documents in direct violation of orders from a federal judge. Will THIS get any opposition?

The nominee to head the CIA is so aware of what’s going on that he was completely clueless regarding Bill and Monica when he was in charge of the White House. Shall I continue with more of His nominees?

Even the choice for Education Secretary is in dire need of opposition. Arne Duncan has been the head of the Chicago public schools since 2001, and has proven himself to be a complete failure. Despite massive per student “investment” from local, state, and federal taxpayers, the system has FAILED to meet standards for FIVE STRAIGHT YEARS! This is the kind of competency and expertise that we want for the entire nation? The Senate opposition? Silent.

The whole coronation week is designed to harken back to Abe Lincoln which begs the question: Is Obama going to lead us into a Civil War? Someone else, in an e-mail, asked The Crawfish if Obama will remember to go to the theater? (I know…that’s just wrong…funny!…but wrong)

The lapdogs of the press are not even complaining when they are shut out by His Majesty and the few reporters who He will allow to ask questions of Him.

Why in the wide, wide world of sports can’t Democratic governors simply follow the law when appointing Senators these days. First it was Blago, and now The Accidental Governor. It really ain’t that difficult.

The “religion of peace” and it’s followers are really working the media in their fight against Israel. In order to increase the number of innocents killed, and to be able to blame it all on the eeeeevil Israelis, Hamas is booby trapping houses with families inside to be blown up if the IDF tries to take control. Positively sub-human. (Yes, CAIR, I said your friends are sub-human, so go ahead and put me on your watch list again.)

Y’all know it is REALLY getting bad when even the El Lay Times has articles about all of the Obama schlock that’s being advertised continuously. It really is getting nauseating.

You probably thought unionized American teachers were irresponsible. That’s nothing compared to this Australian teacher who seems to not care if his students die.

Once again, the religion of the False Prophet provides an outrageous action that is repugnant to all of us who live in the post-7th century civilized world.  Do my “friends” at CAIR have anything to say about this one?

Back to Her Thighness for a moment. Right at the beginning of her confirmation hearings, she expressed that she will use her new position to fight CLIMATE CHANGE! Does she plan on being able to regulate the SUN? That’s the only way to have any real impact on climate change.

Another young man who gets violent with the cops gets shot to death, and is immediately called a “gentle, sweet soul” by neighbors. Why doesn’t the press ever find a neighbor who will say (truthfully), “he was a dirtbag who needed killing”?

This story takes us on a little tour. It happens in a city about 30 miles from where The Crawfish is currently living, but I didn’t see the headlines anywhere until I make it to the website of The Jerusalem Post. These actions should have taken place last month, but then again these people should never have procreated in the first place.

Former Black Panther and racepimp Rep. Bobby Rush is at it again. Now that Roland Burris is assured of assuming the must-be-black Senate seat from Corruptionnois, Rush is resuming the fight against gun owners in America with a bill that will mandate Big Brother’s tracking of all firearms in the USA. If passed, it will basically make citizens ask permission of the government in order to exercise their 2nd Amendment rights.

Thank you, Massa! The Navy has received PERMISSION to train for combat. Yes, the envirowackos have gotten laws passed by their bretheren in the Democratic Party that officially put their interests over the defense of our nation.

Does Mexico actually have a functioning government anymore, or is it only in control of Mexico City and the nation’s tourist trap areas? A new report by US Central Command puts Mexico and Pakistan as the two nations that have the biggest possibility of “rapid and sudden collapse.”

When you hear that former Dallas Cowboy Michael Irvin was involved with a gun and a police report you automatically think the worst from “Playmaker.” I was pleasantly surprised with the story.

Once The Messiah starts his reign, will the rest of the world stop blaming the USA for all of their problems? I only ask this because Russia, Ukraine, and the EU are in disputes over natural gas supplies and the Russians are blaming the US for their failure to pump gas into the pipelines. Huh?

If you believe, like The Crawfish does, that The Prophet Algoracle and his Gorons are complete frauds, and that Glo-Bull Warming is a hoax, you are encouraged to contact him with this link and let him know. Hat tip to blogger Jesse “The Mind” Norman and his comments at The Weekly Claw, Townhall edition.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (72) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

1-13-09 The Weekly Claw

The Crawfish is now officially OUTTA CONTROL! When I can come up with this much column-worthy material in 4 days, and that’s after already splitting my column in two…sheesh. I promise that it is really worth reading, so hang in there.

One of the priorities of the incoming Administration appears to be getting control of spending by the Social Security Administration and Medicare. The Crawfish actually put forth a plan to properly take care of Social Insecurity last year. It is about halfway down this page from my election platform of 2008.

Proving once again that Europe is actively surrendering to the “Religion of Peace” and its threats of violence, some schools in Denmark are refusing to enroll Jewish kids. Why don’t they simply crack down on muslim violence instead of discriminating against the Jews? Would that offend the Religion of Hate? Oh, poo. Three paragraphs into a column and I’ve got CAIR’s towels in a twist again.

The Useless Nations have showed their hand, again, in support of Islamic terrorist organizations. Is it any wonder why they continually oppose Israel and ignore atrocities committed by muslims?

The Crawfish is stunned. I actually find myself agreeing with someone who is an actor in Hollyweird. He is a PO’d American and I think we need a bunch more like him. (WARNING: that link contains un-PC thoughts and a few acronyms of almost Sailor-like language)

Just when you thought the bailout mania couldn’t get any more idiotic, along comes Porn King Larry Flynt and the guy from “Girls Gone Wild,” demanding a $5 Billion bailout of the porn industry. Of course, knowing the reprobates that run Congress, such as Teddythedrunk (D-Chappaquiddick), I wouldn’t really be surprised to see it pass. Blogger American Sweetheart has a good rant on this lunacy.

Of course, most of these bailouts wouldn’t be necessary if the credit system had not gone kaput, led by Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae. For years, conservatives tried to get proper oversight and regulatory action on them, as evidenced by this video which the media got removed from the archives of Time Warner. Who backed the fraudulent actions of the GFEs while they were perpetuating huge amounts of fraud and on the verge of collapse? That would be none other than the party of the Congresscritter who was having a homorelationship with one of the heads of Freddie Mac, Bawney Fwank.

Then again, the Jerusalem Post has an editorial column by a rabbi who is the author of two books about sex.

You’ve gotta love how liberals cannot stand to use, or abide by, plain English. The simple language of our Founding Fathers must be “interpreted” to mean whatever the liberals WANT it to mean, while what a liberal really means must be wordsmith’d so as to be palatable to the American people. Why can’t they have the honesty and integrity to actually tell the truth?

It kinda takes us back to the campaign. When Rev. Wrong became known to more folks than just Sean Hannity’s audience, Trinity United Church of Christ scrubbed all mention of Dr. Cone and his Black Liberation Theology from their website, while it had been the centerpiece of their vision statement beforehand. Now, some socialist organizations are scrubbing their own sites to remove mention of Obama associates or nominees. Hat tip to blogger catmman who is a good Air Force vet down in San Antone.

Some folks seem to think that I never criticize George W. Bush. Well, since the only things that he has done that I have supported have been his judicial appointments (except Harriet Myers), his tax cuts for all taxpayers, and his engagement in the war of Islam vs Everybody, those folks haven’t been payin’ tension. Here’s another not so brilliant move on his part. Let’s give a bonus to the guy who presides over a border that is porous at best. Cue the cartoon guys from the Guinness commercials.

Michelle (***sigh***) Malkin reports that the Dept of Justice is finally taking action against the New Black Panthers for their voter intimidation tactics in Filthadelphia on National Vote For Obama Day. While only one polling place “guard” was reported by the media, evidently it was supposed to be taking place nationwide. The DoJ had to get the investigation public now, because the Obama Administration will try to quash that investigation two weeks from now. Notice that there was no national uproar about this case, but if it had been white guys intimidating voters and that precinct had gone to McCain…

Michelle also has a nice story about Obama’s Attorney General nominee and his role in pardons and sentence commutations for TERRORISTS in the US. Does anybody really believe that Dear Leader will be tough on terrorists?

The IDF has found a map that proves their claims that Hamas uses civilian areas and mosques for their militant actions against Israel.

The worst President of the past 150 years has chimed in again. As per usual, he blames Israel for the fighting in Gaza. The idiot still believes that a group whose charter calls for the extermination of Israel, and who refuse to acknowledge Israel’s right to exist, and whose religion calls for the enslavement or killing of all who do not convert to Islam, can be trusted to make a lasting and meaningful peace. He even has the nerve to refer to the tunnels that Hamas uses to smuggle weapons and fighters into Gaza as “defensive tunnels” that Israel attacked. This guy used to be a nuclear power engineer and graduate of Annapolis? Methinks he must have violated the Honor Code multiple times to pass anything more strenuous than junior high-level English Lit.

If y’all had any doubts about Barack Obama being a celebrity instead of a serious and substantial public figure, this ought to cure those notions and bring his stature into focus. Newsweek’s recent cover resembled old-school stained glass windows and paintings of Jesus and the saints, all of the other “news” and “entertainment” mags have cover stories on him (mostly fluff articles), and now he’s the central figure of a Spiderman comic. Yep, really Presidential material.

The celebrification of Dear Leader and his cult of personality even extends to the DC Metro.

The Coronation parade for King Barack I will, of course, be completely politically correct to the point of a high school marching band changing their name and covering up the logos on their uniforms. If there was ever to be an inauguration parade for President Crawfish, I’d make sure that any school with the mascot of Chiefs, Warriors, or anything like that would get to send a representative if they wanted to.

The Crawfish figured out why The Chosen One and Dingy Harry really opposed the Senate appointment of Roland Burris. They don’t want competition in the celebrity department from a man who has already erected a monument to himself.

The Chosen One has been talking about moving quickly to cut taxes once he is crowned. Too bad for him, since Queen Nanny’s new rules for the House don’t allow for tax cuts, unless they are offset with tax INCREASES somewhere else! Tyranny, thy name is Pelosi.

I’ve mentioned before how I am deeply aware of the divisions within the Episcopal/Anglican community in the USA. The ordination of openly homosexual bishop Gene Robinson was one of the final straws, and now a female bishop has come out and declared “homosexuality is a gift from God.” Then in this past week, a supposed priest, Ed Bacon, said on Oprah’s TV show ”being gay is a gift from God” in response to a viewer. Obviously, the Episcopal Church has now officially gone off the deep end if they allow these two people to continue being ordained, since the Bible is quite clear that homosexuality is NOT A GIFT and is actually an ABOMINATION!

Hat tip goes to AllMilitary.com member fawnmac for bringing us the link for this story. Minnesota Representative Keith Ellison, who professes the faith that commands loyalty to Sharia Law over all other laws, and therefore is anti-American, went on the Hajj Pilgrimage to Mecca, proving where his loyalties lie. His trip was paid for by a “non-profit interfaith group” called the Muslim American Society (what part of interfaith is compatible with muslim?), which was created by the Muslim Brotherhood, which also spawned Hamas and Al-Qaeda. MAS wants Sharia Law to be imposed upon the USA. MAS also supports terrorism and praises terrorists as martyrs in their organization’s magazine. MAS says that they did not pay for the trip, but Ellison’s office says that they did and it was approved by the House Ethics Committee. It has been noted often that muslims are encouraged by their faith to lie to Infidels while working to defeat them. Since the link here includes a defense of this group by CAIR, I have probably landed on that hate group’s watch list one more time (yippee!).

I can’t make this stuff up, folks. The Colombian coffee growers are threatening to sue Mike Peters over one of his comic strips in the USA. Peters is the creator of “Mother Goose & Grimm,” which is one of the funniest strips in syndication. The cartoon noted that the violence in Colombia might mean that there really is a bit of Juan Valdez in every can. I don’t care who you are, that’s funny.

All I can say to this story is…”HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!” It appears that these idiots will not get to enjoy their ill-gotten gains, and will soon be receiving their 72 virgin male camels in Hell. Oh, no. That could possibly have offended CAIR again…but I don’t CARE!

A friend of mine from Baltimore told me that the city’s Democrat machine is starting to look like the one’s in Chicago and Detroit, since the politicians are starting to get arrested in droves, including the Mayor.

The Bible tells that God will bless those who bless Israel, and will curse those that oppose Israel. Blogger James Burns has a post that shows how bad things happen to the US when we do things to oppose Israel. Makes ya think!

The Golden Child’s advisors are now saying that 4.1 million jobs could be created by His recovery plan. Heck, The Crawfish could do better than that! I could create about 12 million jobs for Americans, completely eliminating all need for welfare. All I’d have to do is close the border and throw out the 20 million illegals we’ve got here now!

Even as he is leaving office, there is still a large amount of Bush Derangement Syndrome in DC. Avowed Socialist Senator Bernie Sanders is objecting to the text by a portrait of W going into the Presidential Gallery in the Smithsonian. Give it a rest, you anti-Constitutional jerk. Your partner in Marxism won!

One of the Sun’ni terrorist leaders in Iraq was captured and has confessed to being the “military commander” of that group. First of all, since they are a terrorist group and not a nation, they cannot have a legal (by Geneva Accords definitions) “military.” Secondly, I wonder if his confession was obtained through talking nicely to him, as Leon Panetta and the rest of the American liberals want to do to terrorism suspects and illegal combatants, or through “active” interrogation…you know, the kind that actually WORKS.

The unConstitutional Public Broadcasting System and NPR are hereby honored for our “Biggest Laugh of the Week Award.” These organizations, which cannot compete in the open marketplace because of their lunacy and left wing slant (but I repeat myself), and cannot survive without being paid for with the tax dollars of people who oppose everything they stand for, are asking for a BAILOUT of $550 BILLION! They’re not entitled to ONE DOLLAR of my tax “contributions,” but are demanding 550 Billion???

In second place comes the reporter in this story who can probably spout all sorts of anti-US or anti-Israel talking points, but is clueless on something that most kindergartners know.

Blogger Mrs Always Learning expresses the thoughts of many of us who are frustrated by our anti-Constitutional politicians.

When the official newspaper of the leftists around the globe, Pravda, says that we’re on the verge of an ice age you KNOW The Prophet Algoracle’s Glo-Bull Warming fraud is based on science that is anything but “settled” in his favor.

If you believe, like The Crawfish does, that The Prophet Algoracle and his Gorons are complete frauds, and that Glo-Bull Warming is a hoax, you are encouraged to contact him with this link and let him know. Hat tip to blogger Jesse “The Mind” Norman and his comments at The Weekly Claw, Townhall edition.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (50) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

Counter-Protesting, or Hunting Moonbats

This post is being made to put my 3-part series from September 2007's Gathering Of Eagles III rally and counter-protest against Code Pink and International A.N.S.W.E.R. into my featured posts.  It is a nice story of a Dad bonding with his young daughters, and the daughters' insatiable appetite for moonbats.
 
 
 
 
Enjoy!
Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (24) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

1-10-09 The Saturday Claw

Welcome to another edition of The Saturday Claw, where the news of the week is folded, spindled, mutilated, and shredded.

Hat tip to blogger Jevica for this little article from, of all places, The Huffington Post, calling for an apology from The Prophet Algoracle for his manmade Glo-Bull Warming fraud. There’s some good, solid science in here.

Is it just me, or is Dear Leader doing everything he can to strip our nation’s defenses? First, he names heterophobe, Mr William White, to be the first openly gay Secretary of the Navy. Then he picks someone with ZERO intelligence experience to be the top dog at CIA. Leon Panetta gets the nod because all of the intelligence PROFESSIONALS were either involved in the intel work before the Iraq invasion of 2003, support coercive interrogations, or both. Panetta’s such a good spy that he actually issued this statement when Monica’s blue dress was made public, “I am personally not aware of any improper relationship, sexual or otherwise, by this president with any of the White House interns or anyone else for that matter.” Opposition to active interrogation, thus appeasing the terrorist nations of the world, is so much more important than protecting the USA.

Of course, his appointment of William White as SecNav is only a small part of his attempt to force the heterophobe agenda upon America and our armed forces.

Anybody who thought that The Chosen One and Red Nanny were serious when they promised bipartisanship and fairness was delusional to begin with. Anyway, those promises are being proven to be lies with Queen Nan’s actions as the 111th Congress opens. She’s rewriting the House rules to make sure that the minority party has exactly NO power to influence legislation.

Harry Reid is promising that no earmarks will be included in the stimulus packages. Of course, some pork requested by Las Vegas isn’t considered an earmark. A museum of the influence of the mafia in Las Vegas is considered a really necessary expense for the US taxpayers.

VP-select Biden says that ”we’re at war” in regards to the economic crisis. Does that mean that Bawney Fwank, Chris Dodd, and Jamie Gorelick are gonna be charged with treason?

Well, at least one mostly-muslim nation seems to be taking the radical Islamist threat seriously. Bravo to the Turks!

You know it is a crrappy day when…something like this happens to you, and the pictures are published worldwide! How would you like for this to be the way you become famous?

By now, most of y’all have heard of the Israeli actions that supposedly caused the deaths of 30+ people at a “school” in Gaza. Michelle (***sigh***) Malkin has the rest of the story as Paul Harvey says. Hamas, and Hezbollah in Lebanon, has used schools, hospitals, and mosques for years as places to store weapons and to launch attacks from, so that any return fire will cause “atrocities” that draw the attention of the world’s anti-Israel press.

Is there really any doubt as to which side the mainstream press is taking in the Israel vs terrorists fight? I didn’t think so.

Just to prove that judicial stoooopidity isn’t limited to federal courts…

This story comes to us from Virginia, but The Crawfish, who is in Pennsylvania, got it from the website of a Texas newspaper. Go figger.

Going by the latest polling data, it appears that 62% of Americans believe that Congress will handle serious issues this year. The Crawfish says that 62% of Americans are delusional if they believe that Congress will do anything except act in purely partisan ways to implement a radical socialist agenda. Just refer to the story near the top of this column about the new House rules.

According to the Florida head of International ANSWER (a left-wing anti-war, anti-America, pro-terrorism group that The Crawfish has had the pleasure of counter-protesting), “Zionism in general is a barbaric, racist movement that really is the cause of the situation in the entire Middle East.” His organization proved that they really are anti-war by protesting in a heavily Jewish area of Florida in support of terrorists and those who indiscriminately launch rockets into civilian areas. They also called for the Jews and Israel to be exterminated and said Jews need to go “back in the oven.” Yep, quite the Religion of Peace.  Oh, shucky darn.  I hope the makers of CAIR’s watchlist weren’t paying attention to me again.  (snicker, snicker)

Of course, being anti-Jew is quite popular among the liberal elite across the globe. Did you really think that academia would be any different? Well, academia in Canada is joining the anti-Jew bandwagon. How would this go over if it was anti-muslim? Would the international media have kittens? You betcha!

In Britainistan, the country that was known as England before they surrendered to Islam, the muslims are drawing up lists of Jews to target for murder. The Crawfish had to go to a foreign source to find this story, of course, because the American press still refuses to acknowledge that muslims are ever hateful, and besides, the Jews need to be killed. Again, if Jews were targeting muslims to be killed in Europe or America, the media would be going ape.

We haven’t mentioned the card-check bill in a while. Y’all remember that one. It is the bill that would allow union thugs to intimidate workers into voting for unionization without a secret ballot. Well, there’s something else in that bill that is almost as equally disturbing. It puts the federal gummint in charge of forcing the terms of a deal on companies if the thugs win and then won’t negotiate a deal that the company finds somewhat acceptable. I still can’t find anywhere in the Constitution where the feds have any authority to dictate to companies how they must pay their employees.

There are a few people in the world who actually understand what is going on with Islam’s takeover of much of the world. They understand the lessons of history when it comes to dictators, such as Hitler or Stalin and the other evil movements. The man who wrote this article comes from a family that LIVED through it. Hat tip to Terry of the Poll Katz.

In spite of obvious election fraud, including some precincts having far more ballots cast than there were registered voters, failed talk show host and supporter of stealing money from charitable organizations Al Franken is now officially the only person from Minnesota who Harry Reid will allow to become a Senator. It seems that Dingy Harry really does prefer fraudulent election claims over legitimate ones, just like in 2000.

Somebody needs to show this study to the people in charge on the Navy.

Ya just can’t please some people, can ya? Al-Qaida’s #2 leader evidently has his head-diaper wrapped a bit too tight. He is blaming Obama for the Israel-Hamas fight. First of all, Obama has exactly ZERO power right now, and secondly, how about blaming the folks who started this mess by launching hundreds of rockets into Israel?  (I know that I probably always spell Al-Qaida incorrectly, but I really don’t care)

Occasionally, my hometown does sumthin’ right. Again, I’m not opposed to private charity, but bums are a public nuisance.

We judge people by their experience and how they have performed in the positions that they have held in the past. Dear Leader’s choice for Education Secretary is the head of the public schools in Chicago. Do you really want to know what was going on there? The Crawfish still says the best person for that job is NOBODY, since there’s nothing in the Constitution that gives the federal gummint any authority to be involved with educating the kids of America.

When you want the job done right, put the Big Blue Team in charge of the operation. Between us and the Marine Corps, we have quite a history of causing muslim pirates to assume room temperature.

If you believe, like The Crawfish does, that The Prophet Algoracle and his Gorons are complete frauds, and that Glo-Bull Warming is a hoax, you are encouraged to contact him with this link and let him know. Hat tip to blogger Jesse “The Mind” Norman and his comments at The Weekly Claw, Townhall edition.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (60) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

1-6-09 The Weekly Claw

Welcome to the New Year.  2009 promises to be a WONDERFUL YEAR (well….for us bloggers at least.  We ain’t gonna run short of material at all!).  Fasten your safety belts.  Buckle your chin strap.  Say a couple of Hail Marys.  The fast and bumpy ride is about to begin. 

The Gaia worshippers have gotten waaaaay outta hand, again. The City of Seattle refuses to use salt and sand mixtures to clear their roads of ice. Their streets are now coated with packed ice, and are impassable for emergency vehicles. The Greeniemorons are doing this because salt and sand might be environmentally damaging to Puget Sound which, as we all know, is a body of SALTWATER! Salt is damaging to saltwater, and so is sand, in spite of the fact that most beaches contain….wait for it….SAND!

Pakistan’s refusal to really help in the war against radical Islam is biting them in the tail section. Not only did radical militants from Pakistan stage the November attack on Mumbai, India, which is causing severe tensions between the nations, but now the Taliban is running wild in the areas that the Pakis refuse to actively govern. Their stoooopidity in dealing with the radicals now has them on the precipice of war with India and an invasion of the tribal areas by the western powers. Placate the “Religion of Peace” and find yourself at war. The Times of India even brings us a story of the Taliban ordering locals to give up their daughters for marriage to Taliban terrorists of face “dire consequences.” What do you expect from a “religion” that was made up by a known pedophile? Ooops. I’m sure this paragraph is not going to be looked at kindly by CAIR…again.

Wacked out liberal, and last year’s Green Party candidate for President, Cynthia McKinney is supporting the terrorist group Hamas in their fight against the legitimate nation of Israel. This is hardly surprising, since she has a history of getting campaign donations, in violation of US laws, from anti-Israel arabs. Hopefully her passport has been revoked.

Are the Republicans actually going to have the intestinal fortitude to follow through with this? If they listen to the people who actually vote for them, yes.  If they listen to the lobbyists and the big-government RINOs, like W, then no.

All I can say is why wasn’t I there with my straw???

Filthadelphia Mayor Michael Nutter is under fire for part of his plan to trim the city budget, which is hopelessly in deficit-mode. The plan includes closing down 11 public libraries. Considering the sad state of Philly’s public schools, The Crawfish sees no problem with shutting the libraries down, since most of the folks can’t read English anyway!

In the midst of their campaign of missile attacks, Hamas has passed a new set of Sharia Laws. It endorses nailing enemies of Islam to crosses as the Jerusalem Post reports. How nice of the “Religion of Peace.” Dang, here I go on CAIR’s watch list again.

Here they go again. The atheists and other anti-God-in-public morons are filing suit to prevent the use of “so help me God” in the oath of office and the invocation prayer at the inauguration. Don’t these people understand the simple language of the 1st Amendment? Publicly acknowledging God is part of the “free exercise thereof” part, not the “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion” part, as Congress is not establishing any STATE RELIGION!

The Chosen One has made a very good move! I told all y’all that I would praise him when he did something right. When slimeball soon-to-be-former Governor Blago named a replacement for the Obama Senate seat, Obama sided with Harry Reid and Senate Democrats in saying that any appointment by Blago would be unacceptable. The named replacement was former state AG Roland Burris, a black man. The Concerned Black Clergy folks in Corruptionnois (reported in a previous column as demanding that the seat stay black) are gonna have kittens. The Urban League and Congressman Bobby Rush are playing the race card, with Rush urging the Senate not to “hang and lynch” Burris (“lynch” being a word that is only used by liberals as a codeword for racist actions). The Corruptionnois Secretary of State has, so far, refused to certify the appointment, and Senate Democrats will give the Rules Committee 90 days to consider if the appointment is valid, if the Corruptionnois Supremes force the appointment through. By that time, Blago’s impeachment might have been finalized.

All of those folks who demanded the bailout of the auto industry are in for a shock when they see what powers the ‘Car Czar’ will have under this legislation. Imagine a GOVERNMENT position that has the power to dictate to a private business what kinds of products it will produce and what price it will sell those products for. I still can’t find that power for the federal government in my copies of the Constitution. Meanwhile, it appears that GOLF is the central business of the UAW when they’re not trying to drive the Big 3 out of business.

Blogger Gunny G has been linked a few times in my columns. Well, he’s gonna be linked a few more times. His research and editorial comments give us this un-PC column on behind the scenes Obama people and this also un-PC column on even MORE of Obama’s connections. You won’t get this kind of information on the front page of your local paper, or even on the mainstream TV news. Suffice it to say that lots of people associated with Dear Leader are opposed to everything America has traditionally stood for, including that pesky Constitution.

I’ve covered the split occurring within the Episcopal Church in the USA before, and have expressed my support for traditional Anglican theology, bordering on Catholic theology. The current Archbishop of Canterbury does not have my support in any way. He’s a loony lefty, and has expressed sympathies for Islam in the UK. Well, it gets worse. The Church of England is joining with The Prophet Algoracle and the Gorons by investing over 150 million British Pounds in The Prophet’s investment firm. A major church investing in a complete fraud, amazing.

Meanwhile, the Environment Minister in Ireland says that the greenie movement is a complete fraud and the money could be better spent elsewhere!

There is a black preacher out in Harlem who is a counter to Rev. Wrong and “Father” Pflieger, the spiritual mentors of Dear Leader. This Youtube link of Dr. James Manning shows a charismatic black religious leader who abhors Affirmative Action and the other entitlement programs that have wrecked Black America, and he calls for black men to show self-reliance and self-respect. His church’s website appears to be the complete opposite of Trinity United Church of Christ (the “church” of Rev. Wrong, Dear Leader, and Black Liberation Theology….until the media started paying attention to them) and what their website looked like a year ago. These links come from an e-mail buddy of mine, and former SEAL, Bill.

The whining from the Big 3 in Detroit has found unsympathetic ears in the form of the owner of a machinery company. Just so y’all know it is a true letter, I haven’t linked the letter itself, but rather a link to snopes.com’s story which includes the whole thing. Good piece of writing by that gentleman. I don’t think he voted for the Democrats.

Five DEMOCRAT Governors are starting to plead to Dear Leader and Congress for bailout money to cover the fact that their states have been run horribly over the years. Notice that even the most liberal Republican Governor in the nation, Ahnald the Governator, knows that the way to balance a state budget involves cutting wasteful spending. For Democrats, the answer is ALWAYS raising taxes (and doubling highway tolls, as Governor Corzine of Noooo Joisey is doing this year) combined with gummint handouts.

The raising of taxes isn’t just an issue for those five Governors, either. A federal commission set up by liberals in Congress is calling for a 50% increase in gasoline taxes to help pay for more gummint pork spending. The government already makes over 24 cents per gallon, while state and local taxes are also added in, and yet they castigate the oil companies for making “extreme profits” when those companies, who do all the work, only make about EIGHT CENTS PER GALLON! Who is making the “extreme profits” and needs a windfall tax?

Y’all ain’t gonna believe this. The Associated Press and Yahoo! News are actually reporting that there are lots of ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS living in gummint-paid-for public housing. The Crawfish is shocked at the allegation. Okay, maybe not, since those housing projects are filled with druggies, drug dealers, thugs, crackwhores, prostitutes, criminals of all types, and the rest of the leeches upon society. I still can’t find anything in the Constitution that authorizes one penny of taxpayer money for those projects.

In related news, if you give a bunch of welfare lowlifes free housing in better communities than they came from, they will probably turn the better communities into clones of the ones that the just left complete with drugs, prostitution, and no respect for people and property. If the better communities’ police forces crack down on the leeches, they will get sued for racism. The Crawfish’s solution? End all unConstitutional entitlement programs NOW! Tell the leeches to support themselves or die off.

This bit of news comes from the “I saw this coming a mile away” files. All of the film critics, liberal film critics (but I repeat myself), and homosexual film critics (again repeating myself) are saying that the best picture of the year, best actor, and best supporting actor awards need to go to a film that is “an American Classic” (Rolling Stone Mag) and “A rousing experience!”(Newsweek, whose critic must have been aroused by the subject matter). I knew when I saw a movie being made about the iconic martyr of the extreme leftist heterophobic agenda, Harvey Milk, that it would be hailed as a movie that should be MANDATORY for all school kids to see, and as the most wonderful movie since “Citizen Kane.” It is all part of the liberal agenda to make homosexuality a good and normal thing, since it is completely against all religious texts and all morality. Of course, most of the films that the “critics” say are wonderful, the American people rightfully say SUCK! When has Sean Penn done well portraying anything but a stoner (“Fast Times at Ridgemont High” and “The Falcon and The Snowman”)?

By the way, The Crawfish gives a hearty THUMBS UP to “Yes Man,” starring Jim Carrey and Zooey Deschanel.  It is the kind of flick that us normal (well, as close to “normal” as The Crawfish gets) movie fans can enjoy.

If you don’t believe that making homosexuality something to be celebrated and praised is part of the liberal agenda, just check out what Obama’s Secretary of Education nominee tried to do in Chicago.

Speaking of the radical homoagenda, there’s a proposal before the state bar of Arizona to make lawyers swear to not oppose the homoagenda if it is against their values.

I hope Israel takes the advise of Rabbi Dr. Michael Ben-Ari in regards to the Gaza battles. Of course, 55% of American Democrats say Israel should have tried DIPLOMACY in response to the rockets from Hamas. Friggin’ morons.

Meanwhile, another member of “Jews Who Hate Israel and Love People Who Murder Jews” has raised her voice to call Israel a “Nazi-state” but who really cares what Rosanne Barr says anyway?

While the battles between Israel and the people who refuse to recognize Israel and have pledged to destroy her wages on (how can you have a cease-fire or treaty with a group that refuses to recognize you and your right to exist?), the word from the Obama camp is, “There is one president at a time and we intend to respect that.” Of course, while this sounds good and proper, it really means that Obama has one last chance in his career to vote “Present.”

Don’t y’all remember when liberals supported separation of church and state? Not when the churches are all praising The Messiah, The Golden Child, The Chosen One, Dear Leader!

At least there are five states out there who support the rights of workers against unionization. Now if only the rest of the red states would follow their lead…

Here’s another complete shocker for y’all. The Clintons sold political favors and YOUR TAX DOLLARS to one of her constituents. I know…y’all are floored by the news. The good news for Chillary is that she’s not under a grand jury investigation for this action, unlike another of Obama’s Cabinet picks, Commerce Secretary nominee (until he withdrew this week) Bill Richardson, who did the same thing in New Mexico.

Hat tip to blogger SGT. Relic for this link. Are you an embarrassment to Obama? I scored a whopping 13, and am therefore a complete embarrassment to Dear Leader. I doubt any of my readers will score much better.

When it is too cold for a ski race in Alaska, you know that Glo-Bull Warming is a bunch of Shi’ite.  Rats.  There goes the CAIR watch list again.

I can’t believe that this even went to court in Californication. What is so tough about understanding the word ILLEGAL???

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (71) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-30-08 The Weekly Claw

I really didn’t expect to have a very large column for the Christmas to New Year’s week, especially since I didn’t spend much time online. Obviously, I was incorrect in my expectations.

Okay, who is preparing to write Bill a frickin’ huuuuge check? Hillary just wrote off $13.2 MILLION that she “loaned” her campaign plus $77,900 in interest on that “loan.” People don’t just “write off” that kind of money, especially when they have a history of money-grubbing, unless they’re expecting something in return.

On the subject of financial information, we have another story of a KENNEDY hiding information that could be somewhat embarrassing. The Kennedy family hiding sleeze? I’d be shocked if a member of that clan, whose fortunes were made rum-running during Prohibition, was to have a less than stellar record. Okay, maybe not.

As reported previously, the State of Californication is in deep kimchee with their finances, so the Governator has ordered all state employees to take two days per month off without pay. It is getting worse, as reports now say that the state could be BROKE in two month’s time. Of course, that means nothing to the UNIONS. They are suing the Governator over the order. Just like with the Big 3, the unions don’t care if the entity that actually employs the workers goes under, as long as the UNION doesn’t show any weakness. Say it with me now…”morons!”

Bawney Fwank says that Obama ”overestimates” his ability to unify people. The rest of us believe that Bawney Fwank overestimates how much the American people care what a corrupt gay guy from Taxachussetts thinks.

Hooray for The Pope! Pope Benedict came out with a statement that affirms what the Word of God says about homosexuality. Immediately, heterophobic groups labeled his comments “homophobic”, “irresponsible”, “unacceptable”, and “gay-bashing.” Well, if you believe that the Bible is unacceptable and irresponsible, then you need to quit calling yourself a Christian.

First sign of the Apocalypse in the coming year…video game injuries. I saw this story and could only shake my head in amazement.

As if I really expected anything different from this upcoming Administration, The Chosen One’s Cabinet picks are a very “diverse” lot but the question remains as to why they were picked that way. Was it purely for political correctness, or did he pick the best people for the jobs? Of course, some race mongers will never be satisfied. The Hill reports that members of the Black Congressional Caucus, by definition a racist group, are unhappy that blacks will only fill 5 of the 15 Cabinet positions. Why should a group that comprises about 15% of the population be angry with controlling the White House (well, 1/8 of it, since HE is 3/8 arab and ½ white) and 33% of the Cabinet? Once again, Dr. King’s words are only taken to heart by conservatives.

And now for the shock of the year! The internal investigation report by Obama’s people say that none of his staff did anything wrong and neither did he. Of course, the media is lapping it up as a conclusive unbiased report.

I’ll just post this link without comment. It is too bizarre for my words.

In response to this story all I can say is, “I friggin’ hope so!”

The Media Research Center has published their list of the quotes of the year and Chrissy “Puffball” Matthews gets the top award. The rest are worthy contenders.

Ya gotta love the Followers of the False Prophet. Here’s yet another example of why that part of the world is considered uncivilized by all who have brains.

This story of Glo-Bull Warming alarmists is definitely NOT in the holiday spirit, unless you are one of the brain-dead worshippers of Gaia. Those “scientists” can kiss my tail section.

How much is The Prophet Algoracle and Church of Gorons making off of this scam in Than Franthithco? He did pick the perfect city of left wing idiots to make a mint.

“Vote early, vote often” was a slogan back in the day in Chicago, but it apparently is legally accepted in Minnesota if you live in a Democrat-majority precinct.

The regular readers of The Weekly Claw know how I stand on the impending surrender of Europe to Islam. Well, the chairman of a political party in The Netherlands gives us more background and details on how Europe is almost lost, and how the USA is the last bulwark. By publishing that link, I’ve probably made CAIR’s watch list….again.

Ah, the City of Brotherly Hate strikes again. Some people are just pure morons and need to be removed from the gene pool. Where’s a lifeguard?

Here comes a story that gives The Crawfish some hope for our nation in 2010.

The UAW really does need a big dose of reality. They’re claiming so much heartache and anguish, but they own a country club resort worth $33 MILLION. That’s the kind of stuff, along with donations to left wing politicians, that union dues go to.

As a CPR Instructor since 1992, The Crawfish is well-versed in a law that is in effect in all 50 states, as well as Canada and most of western Europe. It is called the Good Samaritan Law. I seem to have just misspoke, since California’s Supreme Court doesn’t believe that the law means what it says and is null and void. The actual wording of the law is, “In order to encourage people to participate in emergency medical services training programs and to render emergency medical services to others, no person who in good faith renders emergency care at the scene of an emergency shall be liable for any act or omission.” The State Supremes’ ruling states ”We hold that the Legislature intended for section 1799.102 to immunize from liability for civil damages any person who renders emergency medical care. Torti does not contend that she rendered emergency medical care and she may not, therefore, claim the immunity in section 1799.102.” Note that nowhere in the law does it say “medical care, “ but rather simply “emergency care.” Here’s the full reference of a law that CLEARLY protects the defendant in this case. Why is it so hard for lawyers and judges, especially in liberal states, to understand and stick to the actual wording of laws? They are trying to read INTENT into what a legislature did, when the legislature was very clear in their intent, and put it in writing, just like the Founding Fathers did with the Constitution and the Federalist Papers.

Every time I see news from the Vatican, I seem to like Pope Benedict even more, and I’m not even Catholic. The first tech-savvy Pope (he’s known to use an iPod and to text message people from his cell phone) and the Catholic Church have officially endorsed an app for iPods that contains many Catholic prayers, as well as the Breviary, a Daily Prayer issued by the Church. Future upgrades may include additional prayers and audio portions such as Gregorian Chant.

Defenders of the 2nd Amendment take note of this story and how the liberals are trying to destroy your rights! Note that making your own ammunition would be illegal if this passes! This MUST NOT PASS!

Hamas has been launching rockets and mortar rounds into Israel for weeks and they seem to be astonished that Israel would have the nerve to strike back. Prepare for all of the Followers of the False Prophet to condemn Israel and call for international action against Israel in 5-4-3-2-1. The so-called “Palestinians,” no matter how many times they attack Israel, are always “victims,” but their militants purposely put their missiles in civilian areas so that any casualties can be shown to the world as unjust Israeli actions. Nevermind that the missiles they launch into Israel are aimed at civilians. Israel needs to send every single muslim in Gaza, the West Bank, and the Golan Heights back to arab lands. Those lands are rightfully Israeli, having been won during wars of aggression launched by the arabs against Israel in attempts to exterminate the Jewish population of that nation. Oops. That probably got me on CAIR’s watch list even if the above article didn’t.

Am I the only one who finds it fitting that a nut company sponsors a bowl game in the Land of Fruits, Nuts, and Flakes (aka Californication), specifically in Than Franthithco?

I really am surprised that this story made it into the media at all. Then again, it hasn’t been allowed in the mainstream media in the US, so The Gorons can still make their money on the carbon credit scams.

It is now time for “News from the land of the pirates.” Somalia’s President has resigned after four years in office. I didn’t realize that Somalia actually had a government!

Do y’all want another example of YOUR money being improperly used by our gummint? Well, ya get it anyway. Senator Tom Harkin (DEMOCRAT-Iowa) has appropriated $8 MILLION for a company that would not be eligible for money from the program it is coming from, except that Harkin gave them an exemption. This company was failing ever since they got busted for having most of their workforce made up of illegal aliens. Gotta love how the Democrats uphold the law and look out for AMERICAN workers.

Some folks on the left keep claiming that the W Administration has trampled on the Bill of Rights by authorizing signals intelligence on international phone calls. These same people support tracking where all cars in a state go and taxing them according to their mileage. Stand by for a couple of years of extremely creative ideas for taxing EVERYTHING.

Is it just me, or does Caroline Kennedy look more like John Kerry than her father?

Blogger Saltwater gives us a wonderful little story about his grandkids, and how the grandson is becoming a master negotiator for an eight year old. And the moral of the story is……(I ain’t saying. You can read it yourself!)

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (61) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-23-08 The Weekly Claw

What in the world is a Crawfish doing in the frozen wastelands of Pennsylvania? This ain’t right! Eleven degrees on Monday morning, with the forecasted temperature to be sixteen on the morning that y’all will be reading this. BRRRRRRRR!!!! Oh well, I’ve got puh-lenty of material for y’all to read before Christmas.

The Crawfish might owe an apology to the Dallas Police Department, but not yet. Some evidence is now coming out that the attacks on my classmate’s older sister may have been faked by her and the deaths of her and the kids was possibly a murder-suicide, although the Medical Examiner says that the test results won’t be back for a few weeks.  On the other hand, the family and some folks that I know close to the situation caution us to not believe everything we see in the news, as some of it is questionable.  They don’t believe that she did the deed.  Something’s fishy, and I don’t know which direction the odor is coming from.  When I get more definitive information, I will let y’all know.  Please continue to pray for Tammy (mother), Greg (brother), and Frank (husband).  Thank you.

I can hear the conservatives around the country screaming “WE TOLD YOU SO!” on this story. Just before the election, the “economic experts” told us that if we didn’t give hundreds of billions of $$ to the banks, we would face an economic crisis and the stock market would crash. Well, the liberal Congress and the liberal President handed over the billions, with absolutely no strings attached. What happened? The stock market still crashed, and the banks used the money to pay bonuses and to acquire other banks. Congress is demanding that the Big 3 show business restructuring, but the banks are allowed to act as if they were Congress with their fiscal irresponsibility. The banks even admit that they don’t know where the money went!

This quote comes from The Chosen One’s choice to be Secretary of Energy, “Somehow we have to figure out how to boost the price of gasoline to the levels in Europe,” Here’s the Wall Street Journal article the quote came from. I hope and pray that the GOP Senators in his confirmation hearing hammer him silly with that quote. Another friggin’ liberal raising taxes on the poor and middle class while praying at The Goracle’s altar. Hat tip to blogger OncealwaysaMarine.

Y’all know how much I cannot stand The Prophet Algoracle and his Glo-Bull Warming FRAUD. Well, blogger Catmman has a column up in which The Crawfish found an absolute GEM! Y’all have GOT TO GO HERE!

What’s the best way to turn a member of the media into a conservative? Just check this headline!

Not only is prospective White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel hip deep in the Governor Blogo scandal, but he has a history of trying to get illegal alien CRIMINALS to be eligible to vote in the USA. Gotta love someone who puts partisan politics ahead of national security.

Put down all food and beverage for this video that really IS in the holiday spirit, for twisted minds like mine!

I think someone just ruined their career. A real METEOROLOGIST from CNN just blew the lid off of Algoracle’s myth of man-made Glo-Bull Warming. Not only did he call the theory “arrogant”, but he showed the history of global temperature trends. His masters at CNN are probably quite displeased.

The Governator says he will veto the newest budget plan from the Californication legislature. It has a few budget cuts and tax increases, but doesn’t cut enough. Here’s a suggestion to help him balance the budget…end the financing of any service for illegal aliens. No welfare, health care, education, in-state tuition for college, housing, etc. That’d knock off a LOT from the budget.

Maybe there is a small community of conservatives left in Chicago. Here’s a Univ of Chicago professor who says that Employee Free Choice Act which is really the Union Thuggerization Act, is unConstitutional.

Once upon a time, there was a new cable TV network. It was designed to be the video version of a good rock and roll radio station. Then they figured out that they had the power to program the tastes in music for all of America’s youth, so they foisted “New Wave” upon us, and then helped (c)rap become popular. Now, MTV has completely lost their way and is heavily expanding their reality show content. What does that have to do with rock and roll music videos?

Liberal Democrat George W. Bush announced a bailout plan that will go into effect for the UAW…er, the Big 3 automakers. Immediately, the UAW put out a statement basically saying that anybody who expects the union to help out is smoking crack because the union is going to make ZERO concessions, no matter if it drives the companies their workers actually work for into the ground. It is all about union power, even if it causes the union worker to lose his job. Morons.  When are they going to realize that the employees work for the companies, not the unions?

Blogger Ender has a really good satire post about the Goracle and his minions in a parody of Tennison’s “The Charge of the Light Brigade.”

Only in Californication can the State Attorney General say that a legally passed amendment to the state Constitution violates the state Constitution. Memo to your pot-fried brain, Mr. A-G, if it is in the Constitution, then it cannot be unConstitutional.

When he’s in front of friendly crowds, The Chosen One is saying a lot about the proposals that he’s planning to make once he is crowned. Unlike the centrist stuff he spouted before the cameras on the campaign trail, in these settings he returns to his Marxist-socialist roots.

We’re now entering peak sex-season in the USA according to some folks who study that stuff. That may be, since those of us who have been married for more than 5 years tend to only have our fun around birthdays and Christmas….

Although it is for purely selfish reasons, IRAN is joining with the international community by sending a warship to Somali waters to help fight the pirates. That’s a good start, President I’minajihad.

Here’s another expose on the fact that rules don’t matter when you are The Chosen One.

From the “Color Me Surprised…NOT!” files comes another example of the GOP having no spine at all. House Minority Leader Boehner calls the ILLEGAL use of TARP funds to bail out the UAW…er, the automobile manufacturing industry, regrettable. While don’t you file suit against it and prevent it, then? No spine and no (self-censored because this is a family-friendly website).

Continuing my Christmas Spirit theme, there’s 112 folks who are thanking their guardian angels about now and believing in miracles during this season. You would be too if the 737 you were flying in crashed and burned on takeoff but nobody died.

Columnist Kevin McCullough has this column that thanks the ones who serve, tells some of what they endure to protect the nation, and shows why some folks just never will get it. Well worth the read.

Is there anything related to government in Corruptionnois…er, Illinois, that isn’t screwed up to the point of being comically sad?

Blogger Saltwater sent me another satisfying story of 2nd Amendment rights being used to the detriment of a bad guy. I love these stories!

While Red Nanny P-Lousy and the rest of the Gang that Couldn’t Get Approval Rates Above 20% are accepting a pay raise for their strenuous job of campaigning non-stop while OCCAISIONALLY showing up for Congressional sessions and screwing those up beyond belief, Sarah Palin is refusing a pay raise in Alaska, even though she is only making $125K per year. Hat tip to FawnMac.

Just what we need. The Californication of America begins. Do we really want this nation to resemble the most screwed up state?

Meanwhile, the message from the Democrats seems to be that we need all sorts of government intervention, spending, stimulus, and bailouts, but all of that will still not stop the recession from worsening. If it isn’t going to help matters any, then why destroy the Constitution by doing it?

Hugo the Red gives us yet another example of what might happen if the marxist/socialists/Obamists take complete control.

Nicholas Kristof’s Sunday column shows the hypocrisy of the left when it comes to charity and personal donations. The left is oh-so-generous with OPM (Other People’s Money), but stingy with their own. They believe that gummint is the solution to all of life’s problems, while conservatives believe in faith, personal responsibility, and personal giving along the lines of what Jesus (and the prophets of the Old Testament) told us to do.

Here’s a good series of articles from Monday’s Drudge Report. First, ALL of Canada might have a white Christmas for the first time since 1971. Wasn’t that during the time period that the climate alarmists were screaming about Global Cooling? Joe Bastardi of Accuweather points out that European temperatures are 6-10 degrees cooler than normal, and the US temps are more like 1950, the year that signaled an end to the warming cycle of the 30s and 40s. Heck, even the Chinese are saying that Beijing just had its coldest December day in 57 years! “Paging Algore! Paging Algore! Where are you Algore?”

Those of you who are male and have been married for more than 5 years might consider this as a Christmas gift to your wife. Okay, so it would really be for you, but still!

A UN expert says that Zimbabwe’s Dictator Mugabe is out of touch with reality. I think that qualifies for a “Golden DUH! Award.”

Someone needs to welcome central India into the 19th century. They seem to be a few centuries behind reality.

Blogger Gunny G sent this ad from the Washington Post’s website. The people can send, for a nominal fee, their congratulatory messages to The Chosen One. Since they are media lapdogs of Obama’s, they will not allow any messages that are not “congratulatory in nature” according to the fine print at the bottom. Opposition to HIM is not allowed.

Alright, this column has gone on longer than I wanted. I just keep finding more material. I’ll end it with this. The Crawfish wishes all of you a very Merry Christmas, not Happy HanuRamaKwanzMas.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (55) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-20-08 The Saturday Weekly Claw

Welcome to another special Saturday edition of The Weekly Claw. By Friday morning, I had about 1 ½ times the normal amount of material for my columns, so this edition just had to be done.

I start off on a very serious note.  Some really bad news has just hit very close to home for The Crawfish. The older sister of a classmate of mine, and good friend, from 5th to 12th grades, along with her 4 year old boy and 8 year old girl, was murdered Friday morning in my hometown of Dallas. Her father was a former Assistant DA and then a District Court Judge, and presided over a few high profile cases. If you read the whole story and the police report links in the Dallas Morning News article here you will see that she and her family were attacked a couple of times earlier this week, and that her father, who died last year, was mentioned by the attackers. After two brutal attacks in two days on the daughter of a judge, why in the world wasn’t the Dallas Police Department providing serious protection? Are they really THAT INCOMPETENT? One of the perps was described as having a “912″ tattoo on his neck, which means he was a member of the International Aryan Brotherhood. What are those morons doing in Dallas? The Crawfish is, to put it bluntly and un-PC, PISSED!
 
UPDATE!  The news gets worse.  Reports from Dallas now suggest that the attacks during the week might not have actually happened and Jeanmarie might have killed her kids and herself.  If this is the case, my apologies to the Dallas Police Department.

‘Tis the season, and by that I don’t just mean the Christmas and Hanukkah season, but the season of end-of-the-year lists. Senator Tom Coburn (R-Oklahoma) has his annual report on wasteful government spending. The report is 49 pages long, but I suggest that you go straight to page 47.

I THINK this little video somewhat counts as being in the proper holiday spirit. Whaddy’all think?

Updating last Tuesday’s story about Guvna Patterson and his plan to increase taxes, we have this story from the Noo Yawk Post which details some of it. The Guvna is even going to tax iTunes downloads! I thought only the feds could allow taxes on interstate commerce via the internet. Have you ever noticed how many Noo Yawkers move away from Noo Yawk in order to escape the massive taxation, but they continue voting for Democrats wherever they go? Yeah, that makes sense.

On the subject of outrageous taxes, don’tcha love it when liberals try to make things easier to pass by changing verbage? Obama says 95% are going to get tax cuts, knowing that 40% don’t pay taxes, so he’s actually going to increase WELFARE. Now the Californication liberals can’t get their increased taxes through the state legislature, so they change the term to “FEES!”

Here’s one from the “I saw this one comin’ a mile away” files. The heterophobe backers of all that is leftist are upset with Obama’s choice of pastor to give the invocation at the coronation…er, inauguration. They can’t believe that He chose someone who is anti-gay marriage to be there. Well, DUH! Anyone who is a real pastor and believes in the Word of God is in opposition to the heterophobe agenda, since the Torah, the Bible, and even the Koran all state plainly that homosexuality is an abomination to God. I guess this is just another example of the real agenda of the left coming forth…the destruction of all religion and morality in America.

How do you cure constipation among airline passengers? With this statement from the pilot.

The Religion of Perpetual Outrage continues its attacks on anything that might resemble Christianity in the UK. Will this become the norm in the USA as our liberal political correctness society and Calypso Louie’s Nation Of Islam gain more power through their allies in Congress and the new Administration?

This story, courtesy of Neal Boortz, gets me miffed on multiple levels. Would the Mall Of America do this in support of Christians and real Americans? We must kowtow to the Religion of Perpetual Outrage and the immigrants who refuse to assimilate into America? There’s no need for any signs in public places to be in foreign languages unless those places are tourist traps or immigration offices.

We are continuing our expose on the liberal media whenever we can. Do they really expect us to believe that they are not extremely biased in favor of the liberals when the head of TIME’S DC Bureau becomes the spokesman for The Gaffe Man?

Could it be that Hollyweird is finally getting a clue? The big-name stars are coming out in opposition to a strike by the Screen Actors Guild. They have noticed that the economy is in a downturn. It would be really bad form for those idjuts to go on strike and complain about their millions of $$ when the rest of the country is struggling. Now if the professional athletes (such as girly-hair Manny Ramirez) would have the brains to stop insulting all of their fans, who actually WORK for a living, by rejecting contract offers of $45 MILLION over 2 years….

More proof that race is THE most important thing when appointing/electing someone to a high gummint position. Whatever happened to the actual words of Dr. King, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.” Guess that was all just rhetoric.

Speaking of clueless athletes and race baiters, Charles “The Round Mound of Rebound” Barkley spouted off about a coaching hire at his alma mater. Charles, a BASKETBALL player, is complaining about the hiring of a new FOOTBALL coach, who he says was only hired because of his race. Sorry, Chuck, but Gene Chizik is a highly sought after coach who was on the staff of Mack Brown a couple of years back when Texas won the National Championship. Turner Gil, the black coach that Chuck supports, has very little on his resume compared to Chizik. Give him a few more years at his lower-level program and he might be ready for the big-time, but not right now. Hiring based on race instead of quality is guaranteed to give you mediocrity. Well respected black sports journalist Jason Whitlock agrees that this is not the time, and not the proper school, for Turner Gil’s next big step. He just signed a 3 year extension where he’s at, and his (and my) hometown team, TCU, might have a job for him at that point.

Law enforcement in the western world has become too pacified. Rioters are allowed to do whatever they please, but the cops must be nice to them. If The Crawfish was in charge of the riot troops, any protester who intentionally attacked a cop would be met with instantaneous lethal force! If they don’t like it, tough cookies!

Back to the holidays for a sec. This little boy in Texas was busted because he was preparing for Santa’s arrival.

Every once in a while, you get a pretty cool story from the world of sports. This one comes from the Dallas Cowboys and their opponent in the final game at Texas Stadium.

More from the gummint of Mexico and their continued invasion of the USA… That group, whose corruption makes Corruptionnois…er, Illinois look positively clean, has opened a call center to assist the ILLEGALS in Arizona.

The Jihad against the Infidels even extends into dolls made for our little girls. Mattel has a doll that says Islam is the Light! Thankfully, some parents and others have noticed and are taking action. Do NOT buy that toy for your little female yard ape this Christmas.

As long as Red Nanny, Land Deal, and The Chosen One haven’t had a chance to repeal it, we might as well celebrate some of the protections that the 2nd Amendment affords, and the folks that use them.

Don’t try to tell me that we don’t have royalty in America. Now that Princess Caroline of the Kennedys appears to be getting a seat in the US Senate, we really do need to ask ourselves what the qualifications of high office are. The only qualifications she has are her gender, her Party preference, and her last name. Of course, the guy we just elected President only has his Party preference and the fact that he’s 1/8 black. Then again, she does have similarities with Obama. He votes “PRESENT” a bunch of times, while she doesn’t even bother to vote.  Uncle Teddythedrunk (D-Chappaquiddick) is reportedly quite distressed that, with his failing health, the Senate might be without a Kennedy for the first time in over 50 years.  The Crawfish asks, “and that would be a BAD THING???”

According to some folks in China, Mittens bad, Fido good! Yeah, I know…I ain’t right.

This guy is just plain W-R-O-N-G! I don’t think he qualifies for being in the proper holiday spirit.

Thanx to blogger ChrisR for a heads up on a GREAT CHRISTMAS IDEA FOR MEN!

One of the worst Mayors in Dallas history has emerged as a frontrunner for a position in the Obama Administration. I guess the only requirements were: a pulse, Democrat tendencies (the Mayor of Dallas is officially a non-partisan position, but everyone knew Ron Kirk was and is a liberal Democrat), and skin color. Oh, and The Chosen One was starting to get criticized for a lack of folks from the South in his Administration line-up.

There is some GOOD NEWS from the city of my birth. A masked gunman tried to rob a bank in Dallas, but a security guard caused him to assume room temperature. The perp did shoot the guard once, but Kevlar worked for the guard. The Crawfish raises his glass to the guard AND the makers of bullet resistant vests! Now the family of the perp say the poor boy was suffering depression because his father died recently. Yeah, that’s a good excuse to rob a bank and shoot a guard. Funny thing is, the perp’s family got into a brawl while the TV station was trying to interview them! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (45) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

Harry Reid The Scumbuzzard

Many thanks to Beachmom, who came through for us.  Here's Harry Reid on the Senate floor TRYING HIS BEST to make Wall Street collapse even further, and he is having a VERY hard time trying to keep from laughing his fool head off at the prospect of another economic disaster that he can blame on President Bush.
 
 
All because the GOP won't cave in to him and the UAW.  Pathetic.
Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (49) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-16-08 The Weekly Claw

I’ve got to apologize for the length of this week’s column. I didn’t cross over into the “dang, I’ve got a lot of material” zone until too late to make a proper special Saturday edition. That being said, buckle up for a bumpy ride!

The spoiled brats of the left are rampaging through Europe because they aren’t being given an easy life though socialism. This is what happens when Marxism/socialism takes root in a generation…and The Chosen One wants that for America?

Blogger Third Eye has this quality piece on the history of the US auto industry, and what the heck happened to it. A bit long, but well worth your time.

If you didn’t already have enough evidence that unions in the US are outta control, we get this bit of insanity from the NFL Players Union. How can they defend that idiot from the team’s quite sensible actions? Oh, and why in the world do a bunch of people whose MINIMUM salary is over $250K, and whose AVERAGE salary is well over $1 million, need a friggin’ union?

Here we go with another Glo-Bull Warming update. This one comes from southern Californication and involves another lack of warmth. When can we start prepping lawsuits for fraud against the Prophet Algoracle?

There is more evidence that the parties for Obama’s victory were well-supplied. Looks like its harpoon time again.

The Governor Blogo scandal is making me smile. The wiretaps show him to be furious over the fact that the Office of the President Elect only offered him “appreciation” in exchange for naming their top choice to the Senate seat vacated by Obama. How could he know what they were offering if, as The Big O proclaimed, neither he nor his staff have had any contact with Blogo and his people on the issue? Looks like someone is lying!

Here is one for the “Now this REALLY IS the holiday spirit” files. I always tear up with scenes like this one (once you get past the Tide commercial). Yes, The Crawfish is a big ol’ softy. Welcome Home Corpsman!

Ya really gotta love the “debate” over man-made Glo-Bull Warming. One UN group claims that they have proved that it is real, but they complain that the critics want real proof, which they have none of. Meanwhile, a US Senate committee’s minority report that includes testimony and documentation from over 650 actual SCIENTISTS states that it is false. The Senate report includes many links, so my readers are asked only to delve into it when they have some quality time, and a tall glass of adult beverage, but it is worth it. Of course, we’ll never be rid of factually challenged “scare the public” stories from liberal news organizations until we capitulate to the frauds and the UN (but I repeat myself).

Would the Democrats play politics with the auto company bailout bill and put non-bailout stuff into it? Well, of course Senator Dingy Harry Reid would!

Officially, the Senate vote was to invoke cloture on a bill about the Alternative Minimum Tax, but it was really the auto bailout. Why can’t those politicians ever tell the truth when they label a bill for a vote? Oh, and by the way, Dingy Harry was one of the Senators voting AGAINST the bill, but he officially blames the GOP. Afterwards, Reid gave a speech on the Senate floor in which he predicted that the stock market would crash the next day. All during that speech, he was fighting off a big smile and laughter. He’s all giddy while trying to provoke another economic downturn! I don’t have THAT video (if any of you find it, send it to me ASAP!), but I do have this one (thanks to blogger GunnyG) that includes Senator Upchuck Schumer obviously quite happy that the economy is bad while Bush is still in office. Upchuck needs to get beeeotch-slapped for this one.

President Bush, who seems to have turned into a far-left liberal for the last few months of his Presidency in an attempt to get the media to love him, wants to use money from the original $700 BILLION bank bailout for the auto makers. Unfortunately, as the Heritage Foundation points out, it is illegal to give that money to anybody but “financial institutions” and the Big 3 don’t qualify.

I know, I know…this story really won’t surprise any of y’all. The Chosen One’s choice for Energy Secretary is a big anti-fossil fuels guy and believer in man-made Glo-Bull Warming. He’s probably a disciple of The Prophet Algoracle.

Speaking of anti-American MORONS, we now take a trip (not via acid) to Woodstock, NY. The love, peace, Kumbaya, free sex and dope stuff didn’t leave that area after the famous concert. We’ve gotta have world peace, man no matter who it inconveniences. Have those now-grown-up Hippies ever taken baths? Yep, I went there. Hat tip to Neal Boortz for that one.

Have you noticed that anytime stories such as this one are in the news, we don’t hear much from Algoracle? But we all know that Man-Made Glo-Bull Warming is REAL! Just ask the residents of Houston and N’awlins if they wanna kick Algoracle in his squirrel food.

Today’s Stoooopid Criminal Alert comes from Minnesota. You’ve gotta read it to believe it.

Michelle (***sigh!***) Malkin has another column highlighting the law breaking and corruption of yet another Obama appointee for his cabinet. Is there anyone at all who is associated with this guy who doesn’t have severe ethical/moral/legal issues?

A friend of mine (former SEAL) sent me this website link (which his “sweet innocent daughter” sent to him) for all of you guys who have girly-girl daughters, nieces, girlfriends, wives, etc. I say that it is another example of the proper holiday spirit to send out that catalogue!

All of the “experts” are claiming that the auto company bailout must happen immediately or bankruptcies would cause turmoil within weeks. Aren’t these the same people who said the stock market would crash unless the gummint ponied up $700 billion for the banks? What happened when the $700 billion was ponied up? The stock market crashed anyway! Those “experts” need to get real jobs.

From the “Some People Are Just Morons” files comes this little story of a brain dead man and his rowboat. Why would anybody do that in the first place, and why stop that close to the goal if you go through that much?

Here we go with another story brought to you by those folks on the left, who DEMAND that everybody be tolerant of all things deviant while attacking anything or anybody that stands for morality. Yep, those folks are sooooo tolerant that they are completely INTOLERANT of anybody whose opinion differs from theirs. Our friendly preachers of tolerance set fire to Sarah Palin’s church in Wasilla, AK, on Friday night while there were people inside, including children. Did the sickos at least buy some carbon credits from The Prophet Algoracle and the Gorons before lighting off their blaze?

We all know that the poor in America disproportionately vote for liberals, because the liberals promise them gummint handouts and who is gonna vote against free money for themselves, right? Well, The Chosen One is trying to figure out if $1 TRILLION is enough to buy the necessary votes to keep his party in power in 2010. Earth to Obama: “Check the Constitution. Your handouts and entitlement programs not only don’t ever work, but they aren’t legal.”

If you had any doubt that Vlad “The Impaler” Putin was reinstating the Soviet Union in Moscow, then this ought to cure you of those doubts. Is this what we can expect once Red Nanny, Dingy Harry, and The Chosen One institute the Fairness Doctrine and shove their “reforms” through without opposition? This is why the Minnesota recount and Georgia runoff were so critical.

Holy Schnikey! Hat tip to Michelle Malkin for this link. You won’t believe the size of a UAW contract with an auto company. Thank God for lawyers, eh?

Is there any doubt that Robert Mugabe has been the worst national leader in the history of Africa? He took a rich nation that was the agricultural leader of the continent and took it into dire poverty and hunger. Like a good liberal, he has ignored and falsified election results and basically proclaimed himself leader for life. Lately, Zimbabwe has been in the grips of a cholera outbreak that has sickened and killed thousands. Mugabe’s response? The cholera outbreak is biological warfare against him and his nation by the British. Will someone please hurry up and implant a couple of 7.62 x 33mm, 24.7 grain devices in his brain housing group?

Once again, Juan “Amnesty” McCain proves that he prefers to side with Democrats over conservatives. How in the world did he ever get the nomination?

How economically feasible are electric cars? A report from France shows that hybrid engines and other developments show MUCH more promise. They also don’t have to be recharged by coal-fired power plants (USA) or eeevilll nukes (France).

Speaking of eeevilll nukes, there’s a wackjob in Utah who claims nukes will rain down on us and prevent Obama from taking office. He also claims to be a prophet. Methinks he’s off his meds.

Don’t fret, folks. There is some good news regarding illegal immigration.

Is there ANYONE associated with Barack Obama, besides his children, who isn’t being investigated?

“Arab outrage of the Week Awards” presents this story. Iran is upset at a movie about wrestling, and I don’t care! I really am tired of the Religion of Perpetual Outrage.

From the “What will they tax next?” Department comes this story, via Michelle Malkin, about Noo Yawk Guvna Patterson and his plans to raise taxes during economic down times. As the Guinness commercials say…”BRILLIANT!”

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (50) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-9-08 The Weekly Claw

And now back to our regularly scheduled Tuesday programming.

Now that the eeeeeeevilllllll rich oil companies aren’t front page news anymore and gas prices are down, The Office of the President Elect has announced that He is backing down from ANOTHER campaign promise, this one being a windfall profits tax on Big Oil. Maybe his behind-the-scenes economic folks are telling him that raising taxes is NOT good for a struggling economy.

More on the inmates running the asylum… Of course, this story comes from the UK, as do most of our stories about special treatment for CONVICTS. A judge has ruled that is is a violation of human rights to force inmates to go without their heroin when in prison. When I read that story, all I could do was shake my head.

Great. Do we really need more family dynasties in the gummint? Former Guvna Jeb Bush is considering a run for the Senate seat of Mel Martinez. Is this an improvement? Jeb is at least occasionally a conservative, but he, like Mel, is a fan of amnesty.

We’re always hearing about the superiority of all things Harvard, especially their School of Economics. Well, if they’re that smart, how come their endowment is down by 22% in the first 4 months of their fiscal year? Looks like they are really good at investing, huh? Friggin’ elitists.

Some folks see a story like this one about someone falling down an elevator shaft and wonder how it could happen. Well, in my neck of the woods a couple of months ago, a small town police chief and a rookie cop were seriously injured when they fell down an elevator shaft in a winery at 0-dark-thirty. They were investigating the place because a gate was found open.

Is THIS a preview of life under Dear Leader when Red Nanny and Land Deal Reid implement the Fairness Doctrine?

The Crawfish is intimately familiar with the divisions within the Episcopal Church. Ya see, that’s the faith that I was raised in. Over the past few years, the Episcopal Church and the Anglican Church in Canada, have been increasingly gay-friendly, including blessing same-sex couples and ordaining an openly gay BISHOP! Of course, these actions are a direct contradiction of the laws of God as specifically stated in the Bible. There are a number of parishes and dioceses that have objected to these stances, with many of them in the US opting out of the Episcopal Church and putting themselves under the care of foreign Anglican bishops. Well, it now appears that a true split is occurring with a new Anglican province forming in the US. I’m happy to see that my home diocese, Ft Worth, is sticking with the Word of God, instead of the word of gay man.

Hmmmm…. Does this open up a chance for The Crawfish for Senate in 2010? Only if I hit a really big Powerball or Mega Millions lotto in the next year.

And now for today’s edition of “Stoooopid Lawsuit News!” I guess we will need warning labels on every single item that is ever to be sold in the USA. These lawsuits would end if we could pass “Loser pays” legislation.

Here’s one from the “Well, DUH!” department. What happens when someone who has spent most of their political career opposing the 2nd Amendment gets elected President?

This is becoming a regular feature of my columns, and probably will remain so for another 3 weeks or so. From the “This ain’t quite the holiday spirit files” comes an idiot cop in Boston who must have been behind on his daily ticket quota.

Another of my fellow bloggers, Shining City, has a post with a video that is sure to make you chuckle a few times. It ain’t politically correct, but we all need a good laugh now and again. BTW, Shining City is really a doctor.

Blogger The Interface gives us this cartoon about the UAW bailout and this one on bailouts in general. See! I really am trying to provide entertainment for y’all!

The most hilarious bailout story (well, as much as any of them can be funny) yet has just come out. At least this one doesn’t involve the taxpayers’ money. The Offices of the President-Elect and the Vice President-Elect (when did those become real titles and offices?) are sending out e-mails to their campaign donors asking for more cash, but not for themselves.

Well, this story from Bailout Central is almost as stooopid. The head of GM showed up at Crapitol Hill in a car that was supposed to represent the Chevy Volt electric car but was not really a fully done model. Electric cars are a huge scam by the greenies.
a) They only get 40 miles per charge. (this one was shipped in for the GM guy to drive the last couple of miles in)
b) They may have no emissions, but where does their power come from? Mostly from COAL FIRED POWER PLANTS!
My other question for the Big 3 is…if y’all are losing money on every vehicle, and are hurting so bad overall, why are you offering such deep discounts these days? Shouldn’t you be RAISING the prices instead of lowering them? DUH!

The bailout mania gets even worse. According to Neal Boortz, Senator Diane Feinstein (Liberal Lunatic-Californication) is demanding that some of the bailout money goes to a start-up company that wants to make electric cars, but has not produced any. Sorry, no soup for you!

Hmmmmmmmmm…Castro and his brother say they’re open to talking to Obama which says a LOT about Obama and his Marxist/socialist background.

I really can’t make this kind of nonsense up. It looks like our benevolent federal gummint is about to start taxing farmers and ranchers for the farting and burping of their livestock. If you’re shaking your head after this story, I’m right there with ya.

Leave it to a liberal New England state to come up with more tolls and new taxes! Taxing mileage? If The Crawfish had his way, there would be no tolls allowed on any highway, road, or bridge that is part of the federal highway system (US Highways, Interstates, Federal Roads).

This video came out the day before the 109th Army-Navy football game. Looks like Army is getting tired of getting TRASHED by Navy! And the game result….Army: ZERO, Navy: THIRTY FOUR! Guess the trashing continued.

No, I’m not finished telling y’all about the surrender of the UK to Islam. A school over there allows muslims to break the uniform rules, but a Christian girl wearing a purity ring is strictly verboten. If the muslims don’t like our rules of society and are offended by Christianity, then why don’t they stay amongst themselves in the sandbox? Oh, that’s right…their religion commands them to take over the entire world!

Our “Aw crap” moment of the week happened Monday afternoon, when an F/A-18D from the carrier USS Abraham Lincoln crashed in a residential neighborhood near MCAS Miramar, killing three, possibly four, people in one of the three homes destroyed.

Our “he’d be crucified in the press if he was white or Republican” moment goes to Noo Yawk’s accidental Governor Paterson, who had a nice little racist comment at a public dinner.

Of course, we do get a feel good story this week as well, since I’m such a softee around Christmas, and this little boy gets the prize.

I’d also give y’all another feel good story this week, but too many people have already posted and commented about OJ going to prison for 9 to 33 years.

And finally, we have this story. The rest of the world cannot understand how, after bitter election campaigns, American politicians can return to reality. For instance, Sarah Palin has invited to her great state of Alaska, the men who defeated her, Barack Obama and Joe Biden. She has provided a moose hunting trip for their enjoyment and has hired two other prominent men to assist them. Dick Cheney will instruct them in safe gun handling and Ted Kennedy will drive them back to their cabins in the evening. What a gal, that Sarah. She is such a good sport and thinks of everything.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (50) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

'Nuff Said!

A wonderful NAVY Day!
 
NAVY 34
 
army 0
Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (15) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-5-08 The Saturday Claw

You know it’s bad when The Crawfish can tell on Wednesday morning that he’ll have enough material this week for a special Saturday Edition of The Weekly Claw.  Yep, by 0950 on Wednesday, my blood pressure was already sky high and my Word document was already over 3 pages in length. 

The United Auto Workers have run the Big 3 into the ground with their labor costs, which are FAR above what other auto manufacturing companies in the US incur.  Do you realize what kind of benefits these guys get?  They are paid a LOT more than military folks, get 6-7 weeks of paid vacation per year, get paid when they are out of work, and get a 95% pension when they retire.  Their healthcare plans are much better than ours’ as well, since they don’t have to deal with military docs!  All that and they don’t even have to deal with deployments and the chance of getting killed or wounded in combat.  The Crawfish’s favorite retired Marine, GunnyG, has a pretty good breakdown of it here.  When that union is treated somewhat on par with the enlisted folks of the US military, then I’ll cut them some slack.  Until then, I say bust the unions!   

Of course, Queen Nanny “The Red” P-Lousy has stated that the real tool to fix this problem, Chapter 11 bankruptcy, is “not an option!”  That’s because bankruptcy would allow the companies to ditch the bloated UAW contracts currently in place.  We can’t have THAT, now! 

As demanded by some of the Critters, the Big 3 have spent the past 2 weeks coming up with their updated business plans to present to Congress.  It appears that the main part of the plan is to up their demands to $38 BILLION of OUR MONEY

The most recent polls show 61% of the public opposes the automakers bailout.  Chrysler’s Chairman, while ignoring the Chapter 11 option, says that without the bailout, Chrysler would fail and drive the US into a depression.  Nice scare tactics, but why don’t you do what it takes to make your company economically viable, so your 8 figure salary and bonuses can be somewhat justified. 

Somehow, I don’t think this counts as proper holiday spirit.  Bush Derangement Syndrome rages on… 

According to a Congresscritter, the ONLY qualification for replacing Dear Leader in the Senate (other than the replacement being a Democrat, of course) is that the replacement must be black, and possibly a woman.  Nice to see that his priorities are in order. 

Betcha didn’t know that there were a bunch of stoner dudes in ancient China!  That might explain why they eventually went to a socialist/communist system.  Nobody really wanted to work! 

Looks like the people behind the attacks in India have been identified, and they are based in (trumpet fanfare here) PAKISTAN!  Imagine my surprise.  Our supposed ally in the war on terrorism allows terrorist groups to hang out everywhere in their country.  An interesting note in the article is that US intelligence warned India about an attack from the sea.  UPDATE: SecState Rice says that the Pakis are vowing hunt down and round up anybody associated with the Mumbai attacks.  I’ll believe that when I see it. 

Maybe we should become allies with India instead.  They are smart enough to know that political correctness needs to be thrown out the window when dealing with terrorists.  They are not afraid to properly interrogate the only terrorist who lived through the Mumbai massacre. 

I’m sure y’all want another episode of “This ain’t quite the holiday spirit”, so here ya go!  This one doesn’t have anything to do with politics. 

At least this welfare queen is trying to look out for her kids.  Too bad she had so many of them with no real father to help take care of and provide for them.  Wonder if she ever figured out what causes babies to happen. 

Here we go again with another chapter of “Your Government At Work!”  The Visitors Center has finally opened at the Crapitol Building in DC.  The final price tag is $621 MILLION!  That’s only $550 million overbudget and three years behind schedule.  But it is okay, because now Senator Dingy Harry Reid doesn’t have to smell the tourists anymore.  He might have been on the verge of filing suit against the tourists, using the Americans With Disabilities Act like the person in this past Tuesday’s column. 

Looks like someone doesn’t want to be out of the spotlight.  Monica’s boyfriend says that he is open to be a sounding board for Hillary when she’s SecState, and he’d also accept other roles such as helping out with crisis situations like the one in India.  I seem to remember when ex-Presidents (besides Mr. Peanut) kept out of the limelight. 

Looks like an Alderman in St Louis understands that calling 9-1-1 is useless unless you manage to call 30 minutes BEFORE a crime happens.  He’s suggesting that the good citizens arm themselves.  If the criminals have already shown up, 9-1-1 is only used to let the CSI folks know that they’ll have a crime scene to process soon. 

Why in the Wide World of Sports can’t a company be allowed to employ only people who present a positive image to the public?  If you look like a scumbuzzard, no company should HAVE to keep you employed just because you belong to a drugged out religion. 

Want another story about what happens in cities that are run by liberals with a love of political correctness and class warfare?  Well, criminals get more rights than property owners.  Gotta love cities that pander to criminals. 

Y’all probably thought the notion of a holiday to honor The Chosen One had gone away.  I mean, what has he really accomplished, besides being 1/8 black, showing up for work in the Senate a whopping 143 days over 4 years, and hypnotizing the masses with his mantra of “Hope and Change…Hope and Change…Bush Sux…Hope and Change…”?  Well, fear not.  The hero worship and cult of personality has evidently worked in a small county in Alabama. 

The tolerant Hollyweird crowd is now making a musical to mock the supporters of Proposition 8.  Yep, it is perfectly okay to mock people who believe in religion but if anybody mocks the homosexuals, they are horrid bigots and should be shot. 

More proof that the entire nation of Great Britain is surrendering to Islam, including the Catholic Church, is found in this story.  Methinks that the Church leaders are missing the point of having CATHOLIC schools. 

The National Council of La Raza (“THE RACE”) is a racist organization that advocates for the return of most of California, Arizona, New Mexico, and parts of Texas to Mexico.  (well, their mission statement doesn’t say that anymore, but all of their people still call for Azatlan[sp?] to be returned at their rallies)  They also advocate for amnesty for all illegals here now and open borders in the future.  Why am I bringing up this bunch of racist pigs?  Well, The Chosen One has tapped one of La Raza’s vice presidents to be part of his staff.  Yep, Obama’s really a proud and loyal American.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em.  Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (28) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive

12-2-08 The Weekly Claw

Lots to discuss.....

I'm tryin' somethin' new this week.  All links will now be in OLIVE GREEN.  Gimme feedback on how y'all like it.

I had a feeling that my column from Thanksgiving week would end out rather short.  I guess the appropriate rejoinder here would be, “OOPS!”  At least the readers will find plenty of entertainment within my rants this go-’round. 

The W Administration announced some pardons this week.  Notably absent from the list are Border Patrol Agents Ramos and Compean, along with former Representative Randy “Duke” Cunningham.   Duke may be a Navy hero (early graduate of Top Gun School and the Navy’s only fighter ace of the Vietnam War), but his corruption and bribery conviction was proper.  Ramos and Compean, on the other hand, were guilty of only one thing…bad marksmanship. 

 Another update from the Religion of Peace.  Muslim fanatics have taken over a maximum security prison in the UK and are forcing other inmates to convert or be severely beaten.  You know your religion is false when you have to threaten people in order to convert them.  Allah the Merciful, my tail section! 

Even more outrageous news regarding muslims and the prisons in the UK comes from “The Sun.”  Seems some of the Followers of the False Prophet didn’t think their food was tasty enough, so the guards have to drive 40 kilometers to get restaurant food to placate them.  I’d be serving them Spam on toast, 3 times per day, 7 days per week, 52 weeks per year.  If they don’t like it, too bad.  They shouldn’t have broken the law and gotten convicted.  (Hope I didn’t upset CAIR again….

I’ve even got an update from the folks who demand tolerance, or else!  The liberals who run Hollyweird and their friends who demanded that homosexual marriage become the norm in Californication really do support free speech, as long as it is what they agree with and nothing else.  They are doing everything they can to punish and run out of town those who supported Proposition 8, through words or money.  Protests, blacklistings, boycotts, firings…  It really is amazing how a minority that comprises about 2% of the population (2% everywhere except California, obviously) can force so many to kowtow to them, while demanding that religious organizations get banned. 

I’m liking some Europeans more and more.  Vaclav Klaus is the Czech President, and soon to be the President of the EU.  He has a photo of Lady Thatcher on his desk and calls Algoracle an “apostle of arrogance” for his role in the Glo-Bull Warming scams. 

Bush Derangement Syndrome didn’t end with the election of The Chosen One.  The lefties are still pushing for Red Nanny P-Lousy to IMPEACH BUSH NOW!  I’m still trying to find any high crimes or misdemeanors that he has committed.  It’s not like he committed perjury or anything… 

Just when I thought it was impossible to hate the Filthadelphia Illegals of the NFL any more than I already do, THIS STORY comes along about the team refusing to pay millions of $$ that they legally owe to the city.  Jeffrey Lurie, the Illegals’ owner, is an egotistical scumbuzzard with horrible hair. 

A Russian analyst is predicting the breakup of the USA into 6 parts, with Alaska even going back to Russia since it was only leased to us in the first place.  First of all, Alaska was purchased (finalized 100 years to the day before The Crawfish was hatched), and secondly, Texas and the rest of the South would probably combine into one nation if it were ever to actually happen, with some of the central and mountain states possibly joining them.  Patriotism, food production, non-union workforce, the best of high school/college/pro football, a lack of liberals and Yankees…..I could start to like this idea. 

I can’t help it.  I’ve gotta bring y’all this story.  The MP’s next question, after this exchange, should have been, “Are you a pansy?” 

I don’t know what kind of charges they were able to bring against these guys, because all I see is good old-fashioned capitalism at work.  See the need for a product.  Develop a product that fits the need.  Make money.  No problem! 

Have I mentioned lately that political correctness can be defined thusly:  A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.  Here is a story about a wonderful little tradition involving a couple of elementary schools in the Thanksgiving season, and how political correctness has taken a dump on the kids. 

And it only gets worse from there.  A Canuckian college has removed one disease from their charity fundraising events because the disease affects mostly WHITE MEN and we all know that they must deserve it….. 

You simply will not believe what a church in London is doing with Christmas carols this year.  Then again, seeing how the UK is in the process of surrendering to Islam, maybe you will. 

The nations of the world are starting to spend less on Glo-Bull Warming programs.  Maybe it is because the people are starting to take note that man-made Glo-Bull Warming is nothing more than a MYTH! 

I know that the Americans With Disabilities Act was made, like so many liberal programs, with good intentions, but it is one of the most abused laws in American history.  Now there’s a case of someone suing under this act because of a co-worker’s perfume!  I kid you not.  Evidently, nasal irritation is considered a disability that must be kowtowed to. 

How many folks actually believed that MSNBC was NOT biased during the election cycle?  Well, one of their main people is considering running for the Senate in 2010 so his obvious bias might have just been sucking up for support from a certain party.  You scratch my back…. 

The intolerant mob is still going after anyone who had the nerve to oppose the radical agenda of the 2% minority who is trying to force their will and superiority upon anybody who actually believes in moral conduct and Judeo-Christian values.  The limp-wristers and their fellow left-wingnuts in the left-wingnut-filled city of Austin, TX (motto: "Keep Austin Weird!"), have now published a blacklist of companies that are to be boycotted because either the company or someone who works for the company gave money in support of Californication Prop. 8. 

Just when you thought you had heard every possible moronic statement, a new one pops up like this one from Ted Turner on “Meet The Press” this past Sunday.  And the KGB, I think, was an honorable place to work. And it, it gave people in the former Soviet Union, a communist country, an opportunity to do something important and worthwhile.”  Folks, I simply can’t make this stuff up!  For those who don’t know the history of the KGB, Gunny G has a history lesson.  This comes at a time in which Vlad “The Impaler” Putin is making all sorts of old KGB/Checka records Top Secret again, including covering up massacres from the Reign of Stalin. 

Speaking of the Soviet Union, it appears that the print press in Connecticut will now be run in a manner similar to the old Pravda and Isvestia in the USSR. 

Ya know, to my silly way of thinking, any athlete who plays for a college or university team should be qualified to be a student of the school in the first place, and should receive no special athletes-only assistance with school work that isn’t available to the rest of the student body.  Of course, the University of Illinois-Champagne believes otherwise. 

Yes, The Crawfish drinks beer! 

My final story of the week doesn’t have any links.  NY Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress (what kind of friggin’ name is Plaxico???) is in a bit o’trouble.  He accidentally shot himself early Saturday morning at a NY nightclub.  He doesn’t have a concealed carry permit in NY, so he’s facing a MINIMUM of 3.5 years, according to recent statements by Mayor Bloomingidiot.  Some things stick out about this story:

a) Why did he feel the need to carry a pistol with him?

b) If you feel the need to pack heat at a club, why go there in the first place?  Being fully armed shouldn’t be a necessity to hang with your homies.

c) The club has metal detectors, but allowed him to go in with his weapon because he’s a star athlete.  Why does that allow him to break the laws?

d) The club helped cover-up the incident by putting the gun back in Burress’ car after he left and painted over the blood stains on the floor.  Why???????

e) Burress spent 45 minutes on the phone deciding which hospital to go to, and talked the hospital into violating the law by not reporting a gunshot wound when they treated him.  Why would a hospital agree to break the law for him?

f) Reports are that he is going to enter a plea of NOT GUILTY to weapon charges.  If The Crawfish was the judge, I’d give him an extra 5 years on his sentence for being so arrogant and stupid to make that plea and make us sit through and pay for a trial. 

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em.  Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

Email ItEmail It | Print ItPrint It | CommentsComments (42) | TrackbacksTrackbacks (0) | Flag as offensiveFlag as Offensive
« Previous123456789101516Next »