Cursing, swearing & screaming
Repeated harassment and degradation
Attack on self-esteem (e.g. calling person stupid, incompetent)
Insults about people you care for (family)
Controlling behavior (e.g. limiting phone conversations. Restriction on visiting family or friends)
Forcing you to stay awake or get up from sleep
Blaming you for everything
Criticizing your thoughts, feelings and opinions
Lying about immigrant status
Blaming (e.g. "she is crazy, needs therapy")

Psychological Abuse

Threatening to punch, hit or kick
Threatening to use weapons
Threatening to harm himself if she leaves
Threatening to take away children
Threatening to hurt pets
Threatening to report spouse to INS and get them deported
Threatening to have family members hurt back home
Threatening to get another wife if she does not "behave"
Threatening to reveal family secrets
Smashing and breaking things
Slamming doors & throwing objects
Abuser forcing you minimize the abuse by calling it "discipline"
Destroying possessions

Physical Abuse

Slapping, choking, punching
Kicking, pushing
Shoving, biting, spanking
Burning, restraining
Forcing sexual activity

Financial/Resource Abuse

Taking or breaking the phone
Not having access to or control over mahr
Refusal of spouse's furthering their education
Sabotaging work or school
Using Qur'an& Hadith to justify oppressive behavior & opinions
Using money to control
Being forced to work illegally
Not being allowed to learn English or not allowing her to communicate in a language she is fluent in

*Adapted from B. Ahmed presentation at ISNA MAFV conference 2000, Sharifa Alkhateeb's Muslim Wheel of Domestic Violence, Immigrant Women Program, Now Legal Defense & Education Fund.