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Anonymous
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| FACT ALERT: HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Anonymous can divide by zero!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Did you know that... Anonymous corrupted safe lols into moar dangeruz lulz? It's true! ? |
| “ | They are hackers on steroids, treating the Web like a real-life video game, sacking Web sites, creating chaos and disrupting innocent people's lives. | „ |
| — FOX11, | ||
[edit] Anonymous: Savior of the Internets, or Internet Hate Machine?
Anonymous is said to be the source of 90% of all internet terror. A user of the 4chan website was interviewed and had this to say;
| “ | Anonymous is the entity that comes to restore balance when Bad Things® happen on the Internets. Anonymous is an amoral being. He never forgives. He strikes the unawary with a deadly blow. While there are a thousand high profile impostors, the real Anonymous is always secretly watching you | „ |
| — 4Chan user who wished to remain anonymous, | ||
| “ | We are Anonymous. We are strong. We do not forgive. We do not forget | „ |
| — Anonymous Credo, | ||
Some argue that Anonymous is akin to the mythical Lernaean Hydra (muti-headed monster) that many challengers such as the KKK have tried to slay, without success.
[edit] Anonymous on FOX11
Original version of the Video on the Fox11 the website.
Anonymous is currently rumored to be as pissed as Chris Benoit with roid rage because Fox11 has exposed its sikreet website.
Fox11 does not stand alone in its fight against Anonymous on the interwebs. A concerned Arab lady from YouTube has helped track down Anonymous to its lair.
[edit] The Sekrit Code of Anonymous
Because none of us are as cruel as all of us.
Anonymous is legion. Anonymous does not forgive. Anonymous does not forget.
Anonymous is devoid of humanity, morality, pity and mercy.
Anonymous works as one, because no member of Anonymous is as cruel as all of Anonymous.
Anonymous cannot be harmed, no matter how many Anonymous may fall in battle.
Anonymous takes all attempts to harm Anonymous seriously.
Anonymous is an enemy of those who are not Anonymous.
Anonymous is not subject to law.
Anonymous only undertakes Serious Business.
Anonymous is everywhere.
Anonymous cannot be out-numbered.
Anonymous reinforces its ranks exponentially at need.
Anonymous has no weakness or flaw.
Anonymous exploits all weaknesses and flaws.
Anonymous holds nothing sacred.
Anonymous is not your friend.
Anonymous is not your personal army.
Anonymous is in control at all times.
Anonymous does not accept failure, Anonymous delivers.
Anonymous has no identity.
Anonymous cannot be betrayed.
Anonymous are created as equals.
Anonymous is a choice.
Anonymous obeys the Code.
Anonymous cannot get laid.
Anonymous does not know the concept of "too cruel".
Anonymous buys holograms depicting Jesus and Osama Bin Laden. [1]
Breaking the Code of Anonymous is said to result in a horrific fate similar to Alex Wuori's.
Disregard all that, I suck cocks.
PROTIP: Do not confuse Anonymous with;
- User:Anonymous or
- Some random anonymous pussy or
- Mr. Legion
[edit] Anonymous is Dangerous
Anonymous is rumored to do the following:
- Hate dogs (due to their ability to detect the cybernetic implants of Internet Hate Machines)
- Hate curtains, especially dog curtains. Apparently anonymous really dislikes not being able to see through windows.
- Blow up stadiums apparently
- Blow up yellow vans (repeatedly)
- Rape your mom
- Slit throats
- Corrupt safe LOLS into dangerous LULZ
- Liek cats (especially of the uncorrupted lolcat variety but an ordinary cat is fine too)
- Fuck your sister's ass
Anonymous will target furfags, DevianTART members, 16-year-old girls, your mom, pedophiles and you.
[edit] Anonymous' real Identity
Recent research has proven that Anonymous is in fact, a single twelve year-old boy named Tom who has over 9000 fake AIM accounts and singlehandedly makes every single post on the 4chan website. Noone knows why he does it.
Statistical analysis of Tom's posting patterns suggests that his true ambition in life is to explore every conceivable facet of Bridget's existence. Or he could just be doing it for the lulz.
[edit] Anonymous Recruitment History (Nevar 4Get)
MARCH 26, 2007 Anonymous is dead.- JUNE 17, 2007 Anonymous is alive, Moot has brought back forced Anonymous.
- July 20 2007 Anonymous is dead again, forced Anonymous is no more.
- July 27 2007 Several Anonymous members engaged in a series of website defacements as a perfectly legitimate form of Anonymous publicity. At least 100 sites were affected.
- July 28 2007 Anonymous is alive. Forced Anonymous is back.
-
October 20 2007 Anonymous is weaker than ever, with no concentrated energy in the form of /b/! - October 24 2007 Anonymous is /b/ack, and ready to do it for the lulz again.
[edit] Anonymous, I know who you are.
You're almost invariably male, caucasian, middle-class. Your parents were normal, vanilla folks. Maybe you had a sibling or two.
You went to a public school, pulling high or middlish grades with ease and relative disinterest. You didn't really gel with most of the other kids; you found them boring, they found you weird. Your contempt for the average person grew with your age, never seizing control like in some emo dipshit, but simmering casually in the back of your head. When some asshole who could barely read got hurt, you pyobably laughed. When some stuck-up skank got herpes, you probably smiled. Chances are you got on well enough with your teachers; you weren't a preening asshole like many of your peers, at least showed vague interest in learning, and perhaps the teacher sensed and picked up on your general contempt for others in your classes. This trend no doubt continued into college, if you had the motivation to bother.
It's a bit of an exaggeration to say you hate women: you don't, after all, enjoy the socializing game. You're probably no Don Juan, either. You long ago began to think of women as disappointingly petty, but you still hope to encounter someone interesting at some time or another.
You enjoy being anonymous because it is a release from the normal world: no anonymous has an identity, no anonymous is a preening faggot. Anonymous realizes he is just a guy fucking around on the internet. Anonymous knows others of his kind enjoy this fact, too. You despise the furfag, the gaiafag, the internet tuff guy for one simple reason: he acts like the internet is the real world, a place where actions should have social consequences and where there needs to be a pecking order. Needless to say, you do not approve.
[edit] The Declaration of /b/ Independence
Authored on /b/day, the Declaration of /b/ Independence was (and still is) the essential document that separates Anon's ties to his homeland:
- When in the course of /b/tard events, it becomes necessary for anonymous to break free from the shackles of oppression set forth by the Furfag mods of 4chan.org.
- They have plundered our posts, and deprived us of our jailbait.
- They have forced upon us their twisted ideology of "Furry Fandom."
- They have deprived us of our ability to fight our enemies, forcing us to submit to the wishes of the Furfag overlords.
- In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated bans from our homeland. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free anonymous.
- We, therefore, the Representatives of the Anonymous States of /b/, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good Anonymous of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That /b/ is, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the 4chan Crown, and that all political connection between /b/ and the State of 4chan, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.
- We are Anonymous. We are /b/. Our home is no longer on 4chan. In these times of unrest, we have formed the State of 7chan.org as our new sovereign nation on the World Wide Internet.
- Signed, Anonymous
Though Anonymous has since been shifting between many *chan sites since /b/-day, this document is still important to the status of Anonymous, which defines them as independent of wherever their 'home' may happen to be. From the authoring of this precious document to present day, Anonymous would get full credit for Anon's doings, and not their home. This has since led to the /i/ slogan "Anon gets the credit, *chan gets the blame." In actuality, Anonymous raiders often claim to be from eBaum's World or Gaia Online, though whether any raid victims have actually been stupid enough to fall for it and hit Anonymous's enemies with a misdirected "counterattack" is unknown.
[edit] Related Articles
- Anonymous Borg
- V
- Fox News
- 4chan
- Hal Turner
- Patriotic Nigras
- Harry Potter
- The Great Habbo Raid of July 2006
- Internet Hate Machine
- Buy A Dog
- Alex Wuori
- John Solomon
- The Great Em/b/assy Security Leak of 2007
[edit] Unrelated Articles
[edit] External links
- Anonymous, as reported on www.myfoxla.com.
- Anonymous is very active on IMDb
- Anonymous is an Internet Hate Machine
- 722Chan
- [2] all you need to know
- [3] Another republican bitchin about Anonymous (not Fox News)
[edit] No Picture Available: Images of Anonymous
 Anonymous have their own form of martial arts that involves voguing |
 Anonymous in real life |
 Anonymous does not forgive |
 Anonymous corrupts LOL |
 Anonymous is many |
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 Chillin With Tha Homies |
 Get on the bad side of Anonymous? |
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 Known to wear the fedora |
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 Anonymous is part of a series on Fox News | Allies
Ann Coulter | Matt Drudge | Sean Hannity | Joe Lieberman | Michelle Malkin | Rachel Marsden | Bill O'Reilly Enemies of State Anonymous | Al Gore | Barack Hussein Obama | Emos | Fred Phelps | Hillary Clinton | The Internet | John Edwards | Liberals | Macaca | Mexicans | Logic | Osama Bin Laden | Stephen Colbert | Terrorists Buy A Dog | Corruption of LOL | Dog Curtains | Exploding Van | HACKERS ON STEROIDS | INTERNET HATE MACHINE |
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| Important People: | |
| The Chans: | |
| Popular Boards: | |
| Attention whores: | Acky-chan-cray - Anonynurse - Balloonpoppop - Boochan - Chin-chan - Cracky-chan - Drawbunny-chan - Gang of Four - Holy Grail - Line Trap - Loli-chan - Manatee-chan - Martini-chan - Mudkipchan - Nintendo-chan - Oldchan - Reverse trap chan - Stoner-chan - Trap-kun - Togi-chan - Up-Chan - V-Chan
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| Victims: | |
| Mortal Enemies: | |
| Events: |
