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THE MUMBLAGE: WHAT IS IT?

Culture Programming For the Age of Zeroes • End Times Travelogues • Snapshots From Ultima Thule • Last Broadcasts From Soviet Earth • Rock and Roll Death Rattles • Ragnarock Updates & Snack Menu

The Millennial Hour passes, and the Matrix shivers with horrible relief. But the Reckoning remains undelivered, circulating in the post like a bill from a phantom collector. The papers talk of nothing but the latest millionaire who wants to lead the New Rome, but they do not touch on the content of the Whispers emanating from below.

And that’s where we come in. Mumblage.com heralds the underneath, the strangeness pulsing just beneath the culture’s skin. This is a magazine for those who cross the borders on sealed trains in the dead of night, for the scientists who work in unlicensed laboratories.

If you want to submit to The Mumblage: Forward tales of ribaldry, dark adventure and high living under apocalyptic constraints to editor@mumblage.com. If you are an artist who would like to be included in our gallery, please forward digital files depicting your work. No poets. We will get back to you.

Letters of hate and ire (signed with real life names, sissies) may also be directed to editor@mumblage.com.

If you have money burning a hole in your pocket, inquire about advertising via cpd@mumblage.com. Our trained staff of enslaved, mute Albanian midgets will be happy to assist you with your "brand extension" needs.

The Mumblage Conspirators (as far as can be determined by the latest in forensics, rubber gloves in place) are:

Dan Engler. A man of art and science, Engler is a bon vivant and a cultured conversationalist...if you can get him talking. The Ukrainians tried back in ‘94, with no success, despite hours of sweat and intrigue in a Kiev quonset hut. The self-appointed Clown Prince of Sovietology, Engler can discourse upon the finer points of cannibalism in the Commonwealth of Independent States at the drop of a babushka. If Leonardo and Michaelangelo had ever dabbled in evil film, sinister sculpture and digital subversion, you could call him a "Renaissance man." But they didn’t, did they? So you’ll have to judge Engler yourself.

Zach Dundas. By day, he masquerades as the mild-mannered "music editor" of Portland, Oregon’s Willamette Week. In previous incarnations, he has been known to bring death down upon those who surround him and be dangerous in the vicinity of any standing liquids. The Governor of Montana used to call him "Zach." At times, he’s rocked for light with a gang of punx called the Sputniks; at others, he’s embarked on scholarly missions to understand the use of man-eating motifs in hoary Indian lore. Life ambition: To dress like Vince Lombardi.

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