Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity

Your sexual orientation is a reflection of your sexual and emotional feelings toward people of the same or opposite gender. By the time you reach adulthood, you probably have a pretty good idea of what your sexual orientation is. If you're homosexual, you may already have had casual or serious sexual relationships with someone of your own gender. On the other hand, a strict upbringing or lack of opportunity may have prevented you from acting on your homosexual feelings.

While society has come a long way in accepting homosexuality, it can't be denied that gay people face challenges that "straights" never have to worry about. If you are homosexual, you may have found ways to deal with these challenges and come to a place of comfort and pride in your own sexuality. If that's the case, you're to be congratulated for your healthy adaptation.

On the other hand, you may be prey to feelings of shame or guilt, especially if you were told as a child that homosexuality is evil or sinful. You may fear retribution from God or expulsion from certain social or religious groups. You may feel worn down by the stress of living in partial hiding.

If you hold yourself responsible for your sexual orientation, it may help you to consider the current scientific view on the development of homosexuality. Research in recent decades has made it increasingly clear that homosexuality is largely "pre-wired" in a person. Homosexuality runs in certain family lines more than in others, even when the children are given up for adoption - strong evidence that genetics play a role in homosexual development. There's also speculation that the hormonal environment in utero can influence sexual orientation later in life.

Science is gradually disproving the idea of homosexuality as a "sexual preference" or "lifestyle choice". This is something most homosexual people have known their whole lives. The great majority of homosexual people experience their sexual orientation as something they discover in themselves, rather than something they choose for themselves. Homosexual people are no more responsible for their homosexuality than straight people are responsible for their heterosexuality.

"Coming out" to family, friends or coworkers is another challenge you may still face. If you still haven't disclosed your homosexuality to the important people in your life, the coming out as an adult section can help you sort through the issues involved.