secret lives of lesotho gays and lesbians

By Lesego Tlhwale (BTM intern)

LESOTHO – 10 March 2009: The myth that homosexuality is unAfrican seems to be debunked each day as, among other things, more and more homosexuals surface in different countries of this continent.

With the Kingdom of Lesotho being famous for adherence to its Basotho traditions, many mistook it for a gay free country.

However, recently gay and lesbian people have surfaced in that country, with a short term goal of fighting for recognition, not only by society but also by the ruling kingdom.

Even though there are no laws criminalising homosexual conduct in Lesotho many homosexuals live secret lives, fearing possible discrimination from their families and community, should they come out.

Talking about being a lesbian in Lesotho, 30 year old Kgati Maila* who resides in one of Lesotho’s rural villages says people in her community, influenced by cultural beliefs, view homosexuality as an inhuman act of evil.

Even sharing her story with Behind the Mask seems to be difficult for this working class woman, who has been in the closet for more than 13 years.

She however discloses that she shares a house with her partner who is 40, and the partner’s 19 year old daughter, while her 13 year old daughter stays with her mother.

“Our life is normal even though it is a secret. Our families suspect that we are lesbians but they are not sure, even though there are rumours that we might be dating”, Maila says

Asked of the time she discovered her sexuality, she says “After having a child at 17, I realised that I was attracted to women and since then I had no doubt about my sexuality.”

Even though she says she is not proud of her behaviour, Maila explained how she and her partner often have misunderstandings that lead to her [Maila] being violent towards her.

“She would even seek protection from the police and elderly people in the area.”

This behavior has been one of the reasons that led to her being taken to the chief, by her partner’s family, to clear her name in 2007.

“They wanted me to say in front of the chief that I am not a lesbian. They even instructed me to stop seeing my partner and said I should move back home, since it is not acceptable for me to share a house with a woman.”

According to Maila, discrimination of homosexuals is not widespread in Lesotho.

She says this could be because many gays and lesbians are staying in the closet, only out to their peers.

Maila is not the only one, Thabiso Kikume* is a gay man, one of many homosexuals in that country.

He coordinates a one-year-old unregistered LGBTI support group called Matrix Discussion Group in the country’s capital Maseru.

The group was, according to Kikume, started by a group of gay men from the US and some from Maseru, who saw a gap in the country regarding the issues around LGBTI community.

The group meets secretly every Saturday, at a local church, to discuss issues affecting homosexuals in the area.

“Part of the discussions is about identity crises amongst lesbians, as they are women and are expected to dress in a certain respectable way. We also discuss health issues.”

He adds that the group is looking at registering as a gay organisation and approaching the government, with a view to have the LGBTI community recognised in Lesotho.

While it has not done much on the issue of HIV and AIDS, the group is planning a workshop this week which will teach the LGBTI community about “dangers of HIV/AIDS amongst same-sex relationships.”

“Part of the workshop will cover prevention strategies for homosexuals against HIV/AIDS and STIs.

He added that invitations to the workshop are mainly done by word-of-mouth as they don’t want to make group members uncomfortable by inviting the community at large.”

 “We are hoping for a great turnout even though many gay people are in the closet”, Kikume concluded.